Where Have You Been? [Destiel]

Chapter 7

I had to stop thinking about him. But he was all I could think about.

He hadn't even texted or called or tried to talk to me yet; he was probably still passed out at that party. Probably knocked out next to that slut that he most likely fucked last night.

The pain came in waves. I would cry a little bit, then I'd call Jo, then I'd watch some TV. Then that would all happen again. And sometimes, to interrupt that cycle, I'd have a class. Going to class was the worst. I did my best to pay attention but it just didn't work.

In the middle of Mr. Villareal's English class, I got a text. I was hoping it was from Dean, but it was Jo instead.

I just saw Dean walking to the diner. He looked completely fine so I went over to talk to him about this whole... Situation. I asked him if he'd slept with anyone at the party, and he said yes and to not tell you. So obviously I got a little pissed, and I told him that you talked to him last night while he was feeling up that girl, and he got really mad and walked away. Probably to sort this out. Sorry.

I didn't think that the text needed replying.

Class finally let out. I walked out the door, hoping that I could just go back to my dorm and watch TV and eat away the pain, but someone grabbed my arm. I was speechless.

"I thought that was your way of breaking up with me," I said sarcastically. "Apparently not."

"Listen, Cas, what happened last night was a total mistake. I was drunk, and I am so, so sorry." He was fully sober now. His eyes were perfect. He looked like he had just taken a shower.

"Why don't you go tell that to the girl you slept with." This silenced him. I scoffed and walked away, fighting back tears.

"Cas! Wait, lemme make it up to you," he said while catching up with me on the pathway.

"You can make it up to me by not asking me to be your boyfriend and then sleeping with someone else two days later." He looked so pained. I knew he regretted it. I walked away again. Jesus Christ, it was hard to walk away from him like that, but I didn't want to be so pathetic and take him back right away. Even if I was going to get back together with him, he was going to have to do a lot more than apologize once and tell me he was drunk. He was such a jerk.

"Cas, please," I heard his distant voice while I was walking away, straightening my backpack, hoping nobody was looking at me.

When I got back to the dorms, Jo waited outside my room. She had her hands full. A few movies, chips, and a 2 liter bottle of soda awaited in her arms.

"We have a party planned, as of now," she said with a smile. I couldn't help but smile at her and thank her. I opened my apartment with my key.

When we walked in, Kevin wasn't there, thankfully.

"So, what movie do we want to watch first?" Jo asked. "I brought The Fight Club, Inception, Jaws, and both Captain America movies," she said excitedly.

I started to set up the old DVD player. "Hm... Let's watch Inception."

Because I had never seen it, through the whole movie, Jo would look at me in expectation during the suspenseful parts. The whole time, we ate chips and drank soda straight out of the bottle.

At the end of the movie, I was on the floor, wondering how it ended, but knowing that I'd never find out.

After a few minutes of watching me roll around in torture, Jo decided to fill me in on how she figured out the ending.

She explained that during the beginning of the movie, it is explained that the top isn't actually Cobb's totem, it is in fact Mal's. So if that isn't his totem, then it is his wedding ring because in his dreams Cobb and his wife are always together again. In the last scene, when he's spinning the top, he doesn't have a wedding ring on.

"Oh my God," I said. "Oh my actual God."

Jo just laughed and told me to play Jaws.

We ate more chips, another whole bag to be exact, and drank some more soda. At times, Dean would pop up into my mind, but I tried to push him out and enjoy the movie.

"Let's watch Fight Club now. I hear it's one of the best movies ever made," Jo said.

"Okay." As soon as I pressed play, there was a knock at the door. I was so caught up in thinking about Inception that it didn't even occur to me that the knock at the door might have been Dean.

I opened the door.

"Cas," he breathed out. His eyes were wide like always. The green would have shone through his eyelids. That's how green they were. I looked away so I wouldn't get distracted. Jo stayed by the TV, leaving us alone, but it wasn't enough privacy. I stepped outside and closed the door.

"What," I said flatly.

"I'm sorry, okay? I don't know what else you want me to do," he deadpanned. He pulled out flowers from behind his back.

"Flowers," I whispered. It was getting harder and harder not to take him into a hug and forgive him.

"Yes," he said quietly. "I want to make it up to you. I want to start over. I am truly sorry for doing what I did. I was stupid, and I was a douche, and I don't know what I said to you, but whatever it is, I am so so sorry for it. I want to be with you. I want to sit in the dark with you and watch cheesy movies and run my hands through your hair while you lay on my lap and I want to kiss you whenever I want. I want you... to be mine." He paused for a moment. "Cas, I don't even like girls." He said that with a light laugh, and I couldn't believe it, but I laughed, too.

I was speechless. How could I refuse Dean? He probably thought so hard about this, and if he really didn't care about me, he wouldn't have come to me trying to get me back. I didn't know what to do.

Dean saw me looking down at the flowers. He must've read my mind because he lifted up my face with his hands.

"Cas, I want to be with you."

I guess we just couldn't handle it anymore. It was mostly him, but he started kissing me. His lips were so soft, so perfect against mine. And even when I was mad at him, I didn't stop him.

He paused after a while and smirked. Our foreheads were touching.

"Cas, I think we have a problem."

"What?" I said, blinking my eyes to look up at him.

"I think I'm in love with you."