-you haven't told the truth about the heart surgery and most people you know hate you. -
In one of your desperate demand for new friends , you hear from a friend that their is a party at a night club and you are welcome to come. Also a lot of other people you know will be that you know.
And you will have your car to leave whenever you wish. Also your father has not given you a curfew and your mother agrees, if you go to the party. And the idea of having no curfew for the night if you go to the party, that alone makes you want to go.
You go, to your first club ever. You are greeted by a line of teenagers your age. But they where all in make female pairs. They were all large men with large muscles, and girls wearing less then nothing.
You are alone, you have no girl to even hold hands with you, and your not attractive naked or clothed.
You walk over and you hear them talking and you feel your brain cells die. As they debate who got "turnt up" harder. You listen and get the feeling this is going to be a long night. Then it changes.
The Girl walks around with two female friends and a male friend. You know none of them, except for the Girl, and you only know her name.
You begin to talk to them, as you are saved from the idiots infornt of you. You talk to the Girl almost exclusively. She stays close to you in line. You look at her, could you like her? You talk to the Girl more, and more. The line ends and you are asked to pay to enter the club. Luckily your friend who invited you, put you on a list to pay less. You enter and stay with the Girl's group. You meet a girl, who will be called Club Girl, she is semi intersting and decently attractive. She looks at you in a way of desire. A look you have never seen. But you don't talk to her, you talk to The Girl. You stay with her, but she leaves you to talk to the boy she entered with.
You stay the entire party, you have enjoyed a great time. You talked to the Club girl and you have a date with her tommorow. You drive one of the girls home and you enjoy a nice moonlight night with a pipe in your hand, resting in your car at a park sitting and relaxing.
The next day comes, and you meet The Club girl. By the end of your meeting you have a new girlfriend, and a bad feeling in your chest.
You and the Club girl date for a few weeks and you plan on saying the L word, the first time you have ever said that word to someone. During your relationship, you have becoming very close friend with The Girl.
Your about to say it. You want to. You plan a day, a time, a place. You will have all of your and her friends togeter when you say it. Then it falls apart.
It happened fast.
The talking used to be interesting and fun. Now it was long and boring.
The physical relations where terrible.
Everything started falling apart.
She stared talking about the future.
Living together.
Buying a house together.
Kids...
You didn't even know she existed a month ago and you are already talking that far ahead?
You get scared. But you stay together.
Then the final nail in the coffin gets put into place.
You, your girlfriend, and The Girl, who has become a very close friend, go to a park after school. And while your their, a guy tries to sell you drugs.
You decline, again and again.
Finally you all leave and your girlfriend nags you that you thought about buying drugs from him. You tell her that drugs are behind you, but she doesn't believe you.
Thus the final nail in the coffin is nailed in.
That night you and your girl friend talk, trying to fix your relationship. But she won't listen.
She won't admit that your at fault in some places.
She blames herself for every bad thing that has happened.
She won't listen!
She sends you paragraph sized texts.
Explaining nothing.
You try and fix it.
You try and beg her to listen.
Then she does it.
She breaks up with you.
You agree.
Then you realize what tomorrow is, the day before valentines day, perfect.
The next day, is one of the worst days at high school you will ever have.
The first thing, before even school starts. You are talking to Her, she is becoming your friend again. Then your ex walks up to give you her valentines day gifts for you. She is trying to hide tears and she cowers away from you. Her gifts?
A card with a paragraph that explains how you are the best thing to ever happen to her and her life.
And a chocolate rose.
That's how your day starts, then it only gets worse.
As your day progresses, her friends come up to you and yell at you in the halls of your school.
Saying how you are a asshole and your terrible for what you did to your ex.
You can't explain that she ended it.
How you tried to fix it.
NO ONE LISTENS
STRANGERS START LOOKING AT YOU IN DISGUST
YOU CANT DEAL WITH IT.
YOU RUN TO YOUR CAR AND DRIVE AWAY IN THE MIDDLE OF THE SCHOOL DAY.
You drive to a park nearby and crawl in the back of your car and you sit and enjoy the silence.
You don't smoke,
You don't play on your phone.
You barely breath.
You enjoy the silence.
The peace it brings.
For hours you lay their.
Your phone blows up from your parents demanding where you are.
You leave the park and go home. You go to your bed and lay in it, fully clothed.
Your alone, again....
