EASE | unique salonga

before

Chy lingered there, watching the sunrise. It was just so alluring, so nightmarish: mythical. Unreal.

"Pwede ba kitang tanungin?" Unique whispered.

She nodded.

"Why are you still with me?"

Chy felt acid in her stomach. "Bakit mo naman yan sakin natanong?"

"Alam kong marami akong nagawang mali ... Pero gusto kong malaman mo na ikaw padin ang pinakamagandang nangyari sakin ... walang makakapagbago nun."

"Unique, wag." She knew what this was: those painful breakups you could never get over for days, weeks, months, maybe even forever. "Why?"

"Kasi ... pag magkasama tayo, walang magandang nangyayari. Paano kung magkasama lang tayo dahil ... naaawa ka sakin. Possible ba na magkasama lang tayong dalawa dahil pinipilit ng society na paglapitin tayo?"

Before she could answer, Unique spoke again. "Kailangan na natin 'tong pag-usapan. Ang tungkol sakin, sayo, satin. Panahon na siguro para sabihin ko na 'to sayo." He took a deep breath. "Bago ang lahat, gusto ... gusto kong humingi ng tawad sayo, Chy."

His words made her heart rattle inside his chest as if she swallowed a mouth of caffeine. "Sorry. Sa lahat." He gestured his hands. "Naging makasarili ako, Chy. Hindi ko pinag-isipan ang mga ginawa ko. Ang alam ko lang, gusto kita. Hindi ako nakinig sa iba, hindi ko inisip kung ano ang nararamdaman mo."

"Unique —" She started but Unique interrupted her.  "Hindi. Patapusin mo ako."

"Akala ko nawala na sakin ang lahat. Hirap na hirap na ako ... Pero hindi yun sapat na rason para kayo ang sisihin ko ... Hindi ibig sabihin nun, tama ang mga ginawa ko. I'm sorry."

Chy raised her eyes at him. "Gusto kitang pasalamatan, Chy. Salamat sa pagiging patient. Salamat sa pag-intindi. Nawawala ako, naghahanap ako ng ... kahit anong rason para maging masaya. Hindi ko naiisip na masasaktan kita."

"Mali ako, nung inisip ko na maaayos mo ako. Ako lang ang makakagawa 'nun. Hindi na ako magiging makasarili, oras naman ngayon para ikaw naman ang isipin ko." Unique said in requital. "Binibitawan na kita, Chy."

"Sumusuko na ako. Hindi ko na kayang maghabol pa sayo. Tama na." He spoke with so much finality that she felt it like a door slamming in her face.

"Gusto kong maging ayos ang lahat, Chy. Andito padin ako kapag kailangan mo ako, sasamahan padin kita sa mga pupuntahan mo, tatawagan padin kita kapag gusto ko ng kausap, tatawa padin ako sa mga corny mong mga jokes ... Pero, wala na sating dalawa ang magsasabi o gagawa ng anuman na lalagpas sa boundary ... Dahil, pagod na akong mahalin ka."

Unique looked at her with a hopeful expectation that she would be pleased which made her want to scream that something was pricking her heart into pieces and she couldn't understand why.

"Yan naman ang gusto mo, diba?"It took her a long time to answer and when she did, her own voice sounded like an echo, coming from very far away.

"Oo." She said. "Yan ang gusto ko. Salamat."

Chy hugged him, closing her eyes as if she was in paradise.

When Unique was gone, she stared at the sun enthusiastically more than ever. Here's to new refreshing memories.

__________

Narealize ko lang na hindi nabigyan ng pansin ang past relationship ni Unique [sa story na 'to] & I realized na I wouldn't be able to write freely kung hindi ko man lang silang dalawa ia- acknowledge kaya I wrote this chapter. Wrote it differently kasi I don't want to antagonise ate Chy like other people do.