epilogue

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The Attempt

There was a boy. He was so close to dying, but he was living for something. He was living for a promise - an impossible one - yet, he was determined to try. In that moment, it was as if only death could halt the young man. He was fighting for love.

His hand trembled, letting go of the bloodied razor blade. He was so close to death already, loss of blood bad brought the reaper breath down on his neck — and yet he held unto his life with a vice.

He looked up at the open window of the hotel room and stared at the midnight sky. All he could see was her eyes. He only saw it in the skies at first, but now, he saw the stars in her eyes.

He closed his eyes, and succumbed to darkness, and in another moment, he would have surrendered to Death. Death put a cruel, cold hand over his heart.

He was on the brink of death, but his dreams were filled with stars. The one that meant the most, the one that shone the brightest. That star shone like fire.

There was a good chance that he'd die here. Alone, with nothing but regret.

He'd either live
or he'd die . . .

And he didn't know what he desired the most - to live and be the reason for her suffering or to die - and end his own suffering. Whatever his choice may have been, it is now in the hands of faith.

A broken girl, alone in a cruel world. And a broken boy, fighting the peaceful sleep of death, for one single star.

___

Isla hugged me back, and she melted into me. Not crying, not yelling, just holding me tightly, wishing we could just with is all away.

We collapsed on the sofa together, holding each other tightly — it was as if we were trying to hold our broken pieces from falling apart. I held her, as if she was the only one who brought sanity in the darkest times.

"Kapag dumating ang oras na kailangan na kitang bitawan ..." I couldn't finish. "Ikamamatay ko, Isla." My eyes flickered close, with the release of agonizing tension. My hands were wrapped around her waist now, from behind.

Isla looked at me, and I stared back with glassy eyes and an unsure expression.

"Mahal kita, Isla. Hindi sapat ang mga letra at ang mga salitang binibigkas ko para ipakita sayo kung gaano kita ka mahal."

I was holding her so close, closer than I had ever seen her before.

She whispered in my ear, rolling her eyes. "Kailan mo ba balak na halikan ako?"

"Hindi ko alam kung seryoso ka o sarcastic ..."

"Ako? Sarcastic? Never."
She said sarcastically.

She kissed him. She kissed him like his lips were air and she couldn't breathe.

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