LOST

Chapter 3 : Life is cruel

Haya's POV

After one month

It has been a month since Maryam Api (sister) died. When we came back that day, I meet a new phase of life, the dark and the cruel one. Showing that life never stops, even though when the person you love the most is no more . Life still carries on, gradually wiping away the signs of their existance. Turning distance and fine moments of youth into fadding memories. Yes! life is cruel.

That day, at the club the emotions that Shayan's eyes displayed were unreadable. During the whole fight he was masking off his pain by his anger. He was snapping at me every now and then. I could see how restless he was. He really did loved his brother and sister-in-law.

At the funeral, I saw Ashar after a long time. That day, I went to the kitchen to grab some water for the womens in the hall when I saw him for the kitchen's window standing few feets away form the main gate of his house. He was wearing white shalwar kameez receiving condolences form his relatives along with Shayan while on the other hand women were in the house reading Quran for Maryam Api so that her soul can rest in peace. I don't even remember, when was the last time I saw him. He turned more handsome, these years did good to him. He was more muscular than before. His black hair and brown eyes were perfectly complimenting his sandy skin. But today he was grieving, his brown eyes were showing vulnerability but he was posing strong while form the inside, he was screaming at the loss of his baby and beloved wife. Never in his life, he would have imagined that one day he will be buring his love and child together.

Ashar's and Shayan's parents and our parent were college friends, so we ended up living in the same area. When we were kids we use to hang out together. When ever we played any game Shayan and Haniya use to pair up leaving me and Ashar in one team. As we grew up Shayan started partying and I followed him. Haniya being a claustrophobic never attended such events and Ashar being a religious person was strongly against these parties.

After the death of their father Ashar took over the company. Even though Shayan and Asher were brothers they were totally different, Asher was religious and pious while Shayan was a total player. Ashar got married to Maryam Api two years ago, at the age of 23. Ashar being a young and pious, Maryam Api was like him too. They were perfect match. Now they were expecting a child but fate had other plans. Maryam Api had some complication with her pregnancy, she died while giving birth and the baby being immature also died after few hours. It is miracle he didn't died with them.

This whole senior made me question my future. Will I ever be with Shayan? 'No I will do anything to be with him, I love him' I rebuked myself for thinking like that.

My phone beeped and I smiled shaking my head seeing Shayan's message. I hope we always stay like this.

Ashar's POV

I was in my car outside the gate of the house I called home. I was smoking because Ami(mother) won't let me do it in the house. It was a bad habit that I caught recently. I know it is harmful. It was not that, I was addicted. It was only for to get rid of the frustration and to make the pain bearable. Its was atleast better than sleeping pills and Painkillers. I leaned against the seat of my car and took out another cigarette and blew it. The warmth I felt before coming to home was not not here anymore. The smile, remembering that there is someone waiting for you was gone. What have you done Maryam?

It has been a month since Maryam and my baby girl died. She was a beautiful just like her mother. At times, I cannot believe that they are not with me anymore. Maryam was so young to die, which instantly reminds me that there is no age for death. Without them life is suffocating. Sometimes its okay, again sometimes it hurts really bad. Sometimes it becomes hard to breathe but only thing that i can do is to pray to Allah (SWT) for my Maryam to be forgiven and to be granted Jannah.

I slowly move out of the car and entered in. I saw Ami was still waiting for me

"Ami! How many times I told you to sleep. Its 12 o clock, its not good for you to stay up till this late." I said while moving towards her.

Ignoring me Ami moved towards the kitchen to warm up food for me. After the death of Maryam she would stay up for me so I won't sleep with a empty stomach. Seeing her, I remember Maryam warming up the food for me with her baby bump even though how many times i told her to sleep and not to stay up for me. Its not good for her but she never listened. I felt moisture on my cheek, I was crying. I whipped the tear that left form my left eye.

Inhaling sharpy I start moving towards my room to freahen up. After that I moved towards the dinner table knowing that Ami won't let me sleep before eating.

I started eating my dinner even though i had no appetite. All this time Ami was looking towards me. Somehow I managed to finish the content on my plate.

I was about to stand up when Ami said "we need to talk" . I nodded indicating her to start

"Ashar! I want you to marry again" hearing this i sat there with my jaw hanging. How can she think like this. It has been only month since Maryam and my baby died how can she think that I will be ready to marry again and start a family. I felt my self shivering with anger. I shot her a glare.

"Its not that I want you to marry tomorrow. I want you to tell me when your are ready. I am old beta (child) "she said holding my hand " Its difficult for me to maintain this big house. I know we have servants but still I want someone who could manage it all, its tiring for me" she said with hope full eyes.

"No! Ami I cannot marry not now, not for next few years. Its not that Maryam and my baby died that day, a part of me also died " I said maintaining my calm. As our religion says not to use sharpness of your tongue on your mother who taught you how to speak.

"Then what should I do tell me? I am old Ashar have some mercy on me". Ami said with pleading in her eyes.

"Ami, I cannot, I will not. Its not that I am your only child think about Shayan. I will not marry and thats final" I said while standing up before I could say anything that I would regret in the morning. For Allah's sake it's a month, only a month since Maryam died

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