CC7

CC7 - Part 14

Ever since Lauren had left me with the comic book for Lara, I had read it an estimated twenty times. I couldn’t even remember when I had actually gone to sleep because I was so endeared about the story surrounding my daughter being a soccer-playing superhero. The more times I looked at the pictures capturing the storyline, the more I realized how horribly I had treated Lauren. Maybe she was right and the best thing I could do for her was let her be in peace after everything she had gone through because of me.

The next morning was the time for our departure. The entire team would head to the airport and then go their separate ways. I reached the lobby downstairs and saw Lauren with Normani. They were laughing about something on Normani’s iPad while I tried to maintain a low profile.

That was hard to do when I suddenly saw Ariana entering the hotel lobby. We hadn’t talked in a few days since our fight and therefore break-up I assumed. I was more than surprised to see her coming back. Thankfully not everyone was downstairs yet, so we had a few moments to ourselves. The shorter one approached me quickly and I was absolutely frozen.

“I couldn’t let you leave like that”, Ariana explained and I noticed Lauren looking at us out of the corner of my eye. “I didn’t mean to blow up, I’m sorry.”

“I didn’t mean to fight with you either”, I replied rather quietly even though it was impossible for Lauren to hear us due to the distance.

“You were right. I put you in a bad spot because I was jealous although you haven’t given me any reason to distrust you lately”, the light-brunette kept going while my head was spinning. “I don’t want to throw what we have away over a heated argument if you still want to be with me. And I won’t bring it up anymore, I promise.”

Ariana sounded hopeful and nervous at the same time. My heart was beating so fast which surprised me. I should have been over the moon about the prospect of getting back together with her. But I wasn’t. Something had changed.

“I think it’s best if we stay friends”, I said cautiously as my ex-girlfriend’s face fell.

“Oh”, she breathed apparently not expecting that answer. “Oh”, she repeated and I felt horrible for letting down another person I cared for.

“I’m so sorry”, I whispered and took a deep breath. “I don’t want to hurt you any more than I already have. That seems to be the only thing I’m doing lately.”

“What’s changed?” she asked simply and looked at me intently.

“You’re an incredible person”, I responded truthfully. “You have always been there for me. Especially in those times when no one had been and I love you for that-“

“But you’re not in love with me”, she cut in and took the words out of my mouth. Perhaps I wouldn’t have been so direct but she hit the nail on the head. I had settled for her.

“No”, I confirmed just above a whisper and the older one exhaled loudly.

“Be honest with me”, she pleaded. “Are you in love with her?”

I knew who she was talking about without actually mentioning her name. My eyes almost darted to Lauren again but I couldn’t look at my teammate now or answer the question.

“Well, guess I’ve been right all along”, Ariana was clearly upset after my silence.

“No, I don’t know what I feel. It’s just all so confusing”, I confessed more frustrated but didn’t want her to think everything between us had been a lie. I genuinely cared about her but it wasn’t enough to sustain a relationship simply because it was comfortable.