Working for Mr. Bennington

I've become so numb

It's been a few days since Jason attacked us. Chester hasn't woken up. He was still in the hospital, unconscious. Mike took care of all the press stuff and Maddie and Sammy showed their support too by being there. Bringing foods and drinks. I felt so alone without Chester although there was so many people around me. I just want him to wake up and be all okay. I felt so numb. Like there is no feeling in me. They haven't found Jason yet. He is still on the run. But the police is looking everywhere for him. Mike also were interviewing bodyguards for us. Well for me and Chester. And for the band. And he also installed a whole new security system in the house. Lilly keeps sending flowers with Mike with a get well soon boss card. I was sitting next to Chester's bed, holding his hand.

"Baby please wake up. I miss you. I need you baby." I said crying. "Please baby... Just open your eyes." I sat there all quiet for a while.

"I've become so numb. I can't feel you there. Become so tired." I sing.

"Hey." Mike comes into the room with flowers.

"Hey." 

"Lilly send flowers again." 

"Just put it down." 

He puts it down and he comes to stand next to me.

"Come with me. I want you to see something." 

"But what if he wakes up?" 

"We will be back soon." 

I nod and gave Chester a kiss on his cheek. We went out of his room and we went to the elevator. We get inside and he pressed the button for the ground floor. We walked out of the elevator and he shows me to walk to the door outside. 

We got outside and there were flowers on the sidewalk. Fans were busy writing on the sidewalk with chalk. "Get well soon Chester" were some of them I read. "Hope and pray you will be alright." were others. There were fans actually busy praying. And some were lighting candles. I covered my mouth and I started crying seeing this. Mike wraps his arm around me, holding me up. And I laid my head on his shoulder. The tears just kept coming. He hugs me tight.

"People care Emma." he says.

One of the fans comes to us. She tap me on my shoulder. I looked up to her.

"Are you Emma?" she asks me.

I nod and she hugs me tight. 

"We're praying for him." she says.

"T-thanks." I said hugging her back.

She lets go and I saw she had a chalk in her hand. 

"May I?" I asked pointing to the chalk. She nods and hands it to me. I went to the sidewalk and the words in my mind were the ones he wrote the other day. I went on my knees and I wrote it on the sidewalk. "Love keeps us kind. Chester Bennington. I love you baby. Come back to me." I lit a candle and I got up. I gave it back to her. Mike took pictures of everything. And we went back inside. We went back to Chester's room and when we got inside Chester was awake.

"Hey baby girl." he said smiling. 

I went to him and I hugged him tight.

"I get shot and you left." he says chuckling.

"No. No. Mike just showed me something." 

He laughs. 

"I'm joking baby girl. I heard you. I know you were here." he says smiling.

I hugged him again.

"I'm so glad you're back."

He hugs me back.

"I'm here baby girl."

"Glad to have you back Chaz." Mike says.

"Good to be back." 

I let go and sat on the bed. Mike sat down.

"Did they catch the asshole?" Chester asks.

I looked at Mike. Mike shakes his head.

"They are looking everywhere for him." I said.

"They better pray I don't find him first." Chester says.

"Let it go Chaz. They will find him."

"After what he did. I don't think I can let it go." Chester says.

"It's not worth it baby." 

He just nod. Then he smiles.

"I'm very proud of you for standing up to him baby girl."

"I should have taken the gun. I don't know why I haven't thought about it." 

"Hey baby girl. You tried to safe everyone." 

"Yeah."

"Baby girl do you have your journal with you?"

I nod and took it out of my bag.

"Can you write this down for me?" he asks.

I nod. 

"Do you have a song?" Mike asks.

"The words went through my mind the time I was lying on the floor. And it's still fresh in my memory." Chester says. 

"Alright then." Mike says.

"Are you ready to write it down?" he asks and I nod.

"I dreamed I was missing. You were so scared. But no one would listen. Cause no one else cared. After my dreaming. I woke with this fear. What am I leaving when I'm done here? So if you asking me I want you to know. When my time comes forget the wrong that I've done. Help me leave behind some reasons to be missed. And don't resent me and when you're feeling empty. Keep me in your memory. Leave out all the rest. Don't be afraid. I've taken my beating. I've shared what I've made. I'm strong on the surface. Not all the way through. I've never been prefect but neither have you. Forgetting all the hurt inside. You've learned to hide so well. Pretending someone else can come and save me from myself. I can't be who you are."

I sat there crying from these words. 

"Chaz."

"I'm sorry I thought I was dying with million thoughts in my head at the time."

"Then you should see this." Mike gives his phone to Chester. He goes through the pictures. And he smiles. He shows me the pic of the thing I wrote.

"I'm not releasing this song just yet." he said. I smiled, wiping the tears away.

"We'll put this one on the new album." Mike says. Chester nods.

"I'm starving." he says.

"I'll go ask them to bring you food baby." I got up but he pulls me back on my wrist.

"You stay." he points to Mike. "You go." Mike laughs. Mike gets up and he leaves the room. Chester pulls me on the bed.

"Come lay here with me baby girl." he says.

I laid my head on his chest and he wraps his arms around me. 

"Are you alright baby girl?"

"Yeah. Why are you asking me? I'm not the one who got shot."

"I'm making sure. He hit you hard."

"You took a bullet for me baby. Don't worry about me. Worry about yourself."

"I'll take a bullet for you any day baby girl."

I hugged him tight. 

"Please don't ever leave me again. It's horrible without you." 

He holds me tight. "It's okay baby girl. I'm still here."

We laid there for a while.

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