|DISCONTINUED| [NORENMIN] 私は思った。(ｉ ｔｈｏｕｇｈｔ)

i don't have any idea to put here lol

thanks for checking in, i'm still a piece of garbage :/

renjun was just an average kid. he has a family, who loves and supports him. he has friends, doing what friends do, like eating too much mcdonalds at 12am while watching anime.

but there's one thing that he irks about himself: his fucking crush on lee jeno.

he doesn't really cared about jeno at first, he only cared about surviving high school and college, any other students usually think of, it wasn't until he saw the dance competition on his freshman year.

when renjun saw jeno dancing, smiling and moving with energy, he was captivated and from then on he idolized him, and every time he sees jeno dancing he thinks: 'i can't. he's cute. he's so cute. come on he's like Jesus and chocolate. just look at him.' that's when renjun realize it wasn't about the dancing.

he had a fucking crush!

though it wasn't about being gay that bothers him, no, but he wish it was. cause you know what's worse than having a crush on a boy? having a crush on a boy that has a boyfriend!

ーit's not like they announce it officially, but it's how they act each other that makes him believe that they are dating, kissing each other's cheeks and cuddling (even though jaemin does it with everyone), it's enough proof for him. and he doesn't want to ruin this love between these two beautiful people, so he tries to move on.

that's why when jeno ask renjun to be his partner in science for the whole semester, he doesn't know what to answer.

he blinks. "what?" he asks, not wanting to believe what jeno just said, too nervous by seeing him standing in front of him.

jeno shyly smiles in realization, thinking that maybe that his voice was not loud enough for him to heard it. "oh... i asked if you could be my partner." he pauses, seeing renjun shock at the sudden request and quickly explains, "jaemin's not going to be here for the whole semester and you clearly haven't have one either, so i'm asking if you could be partner for our science project." jeno points out, rubbing his hand on his nape.

renjun ears perked when he hears the word partner, 'partner? but i already have--' he sees felix smirking devilishly at him while fleeing together with another student '--that little shit.' he turns his eyes away from felix, his fists clenched.

jeno sees this and briskly says," ーi mean if you want to, you can say no, not that i don't like partnering with you. y-you can just say no, if you already have one or... if you have someone in mind to partner with. it's totally fine with me." he stammers, his words stumble and his tongue tied. jeno secretly face palm himself for embarrassing himself again.

"no." renjun says immediately, not knowing what to say as the word suddenly fell from his mouth, fuck. "i mean yes!" fleetly he says, maybe much louder than expected. renjun blushes at his sudden action and clears his throat as he could hear felix giggling nearby. "urm sorry about that, yes, my answer is yes." he says quieter than before.

jeno smiles but it falters as silence fell upon them, the awkwardness was cold and it made renjun's spine shiver and he knows jeno feels it too. both of them doesn't know how to end the conversation, jeno just wanted to ask renjun and now he doesn't know what to do after that, and renjun wasn't prepared to talk or even see his crush so he wasn't really doing well on giving a good impression.

'jeno come on say something!' jeno says to himself.

"cool!" jeno says trying to light up the mood as he sees renjun fidgeting and shifting anxiously. "... so we'll talk about it tomorrow or maybe after school?" jeno announces, he slightly celebrates as he sees renjun relax a bit and the atmosphere was slightly less awkward than before.