diet of lies

Chapter 10~ P'il Chae

     THE FINAL BELL RINGS AND THE FEELING OF CONTENTMENT BUBBLES INSIDE. Another run-in with Jimin hasn't occurred. However, that doesn't stop me from replaying his face like a film. Irrefutably, Jimin is the definition of male eye-candy. Though, he'd be more attractive if he wasn't so douchey. As far as I know he is simply a sadistic fuck who takes gratification in making any girl feel squirmy under his touch. Hopefully, he's got some time to turn in the other direction.

***

       By now the hallways of GHS appear like the set of a movie with an absence of bustling teenagers. I walk to my locker, along with the feeling of being followed. But I decide to ignore it, blaming the feeling on pure paranoia.
I scramble to switch out some books and stuff others into my bag to take home. I freeze when the sound of shoes scuffing on the linoleum floor grows louder down the hall.
Maybe I'm not paranoid.

I peek behind my locker door and instantly regret it. My blood starts to boil. It's Jimin.
   "Come to insult me some more?" I say shielding myself behind the locker door. Lockers pop and plunk as he leans against the locker unit.
"No, I have a question."
     "If this question has anything to do with whether or not you're an ass, the answer is one-hundred percent yes." I scoff.
"Hilarious, but no."
    "Shame." I sigh.
"What did you mean by 'I know you'." He speaks.
    "Isn't it obvious."
"Well sugarcane, if that was the case I wouldn't be here."
Why must he keep calling me these cheap nicknames, like I'm one of his second-hand chic's? I clutch my locker door and bite my cheek before slamming it shut.
   "Jesus Christ Chae!" Jimin jumps. I'm directly facing him.
Jimin's jet hair is like a wet mop perched atop his head. He must've come from gym, he's all sweaty. Some parts lay in his view sight but he doesn't try to remove them. My fingers twitch at my sides. A small part of me wants to introduce my fingers to the damp locks and move them back to his forehead.
    "Admiring the view there?" Jimin's lips curl to a smirk. My cheeks grow into two fresh cherry red tomatoes on my face.
"Shut up,"
    "What? You're the one who was star gazing at me."
"I didn't mean to, jerk." I run my fingers through my hair.
Jimin licks his lips. "So, who am I?" He presses.
    "Goddamnit Jimin. You're so ignorant!" If steam could blast out my ears like they do in cartoons, they would.
"You know who I am?" He asks.
    "I know who you are, Park Jimin. You aren't special." I poke his chest.
" 'that so?"
"Yes."
"Well. Go on," He circulates his wrist. "give me my palm reading."
Ill give you punch to to the gut, that's what I'll do.

   "You're a player," I start my lecture. "All you do is sneak your way into the panties of every girl you come into contact with. You could give less of a shit about your grades, just as long as you're successfully laid by the end of the day. Don't you fucking understand?" I'm laughing but also dead serious. My face is centimeters away from his. Jimin seems relieved, as his shoulders relax tremendously. Jimin traps me between his body and the cold lockers behind me. His hands rest on either side of my ears. He cocks his head and peers down at me. His coffee-rich eyes study my own while his warm breath caresses my collar in an uncomfortably soothing way. My hearts racing. It's hurting my chest.
    "Spot on babe. It's amazing how well you know me right off the bat." He mutters like velvet.
"It's not hard to spot a person like you." I snap back.
Jimin leans in. If he actually tries to kiss me right now he better catch these hands or he's getting a fucking busted lip.
    "This," He gestures to himself. "It's just an exterior princess." Jimin's voice is scratchy.
"Just wait till you see what I'm made of." His gaze casts to my lips and I can see how he bites his own.
    "I wouldn't spend enough time with you for that to ever happen." I flick his head to hint that he needs to back off.
"We'll just have to fix that then." He smiles again.
    "In your dreams."
"Why do you fight this?" He rolls his eyes playfully, inching closer to me. Quickly, I feel the limit of my personal space crumbling. His thumbs graze the bottom of my pink lips causing my breath to hitch uncontrollably.
    "We could really have some fun, you and I." He purrs in my ear. I seize his hand.
"Cut it out." I boom. Why does he do this to me?
    "You act like you aren't enjoying this."
" 'Cause I'm not."
    "Funny, you definitely felt something before. Just the way you were staring at me, Chae, said enough." He smirks.
"You mean, disgust?" It's easy to see I'm bluffing. Jimin pulls his hand out from my weak hold.

Its obvious that he makes me anxious; this terrible tickling sensation in my stomach that makes me want to clamp it shut to get it to stop. The same squeamish feeling anyone would get around their crush. It's so bad I can't tell anymore if I'm repelled by his nature or secretly and intensely turned on.

     Jimin laughs. "You lie awfully,"
"I don't,"
    "You do," He smiles.
When Jimin's hand creeps to my waistline my mouth goes dryer than the desert. His crazed puce eyes are outlining the bowed curves of my lips with deep eagerness. And before I can act there's pale warmth. I'm trapped in a torrid, and moldable kiss. Jimin tilts his head to deepen the kiss and my skin goes humid. He lifts my leg and jerks me against his chest. I hold onto his shoulders with no consciousness.

I shouldn't be enjoying this, but I can't stop myself. He's evil. He's an jerk. He's the enemy. But this-- feels good. It's a spark he's lit inside me that I can't extinguish. Not even with a thousands oceans.
   My hands find their way to his scalp, where my fingers get lost in the dampness of his hair. We're tangled in muse of fake love. Pure imagination. Jimin tries to go farther, but this isn't right anymore. I push my hands firmly on his chest. But Jimin won't stop. I move my head out of his reach.
    "Cut it out Jimin," I'm queasy.
He pulls away. His eyes are like those of a puppy. Bewildered.
    "Did you...?" He mumbled with anticipation. He shakes his head and his eyes go back to normal.
"I mean... it was just getting good," He complains. He looks down and touches his lips in remembrance. His eyes flash back at me and he drops his hands back at his sides.
    "I don't care." I stare into his soft lusty eyes. I'm growing distant.
"Lets pretend this never happened." I fold my mouth and walk away. But Jimin grips my arm.
    "Chae-"
"Jimin. Let go." I rig my arm up. He snatches my waist and spins me to face him.
    "Wait, Chae, you felt that too? Right?"
"It wasn't real. Just teenage angst, Jimin. There's nothing between us, nor will there ever be."
    "Stop denying it." He growls
"You're not listening to me." I snap back.
Jimins grip gets harsher and I feel pain.
    "Chae, did you feels anything? Anything at all?" His eyes grow with the subtle anticipation of my response.
I pause. I can't say that I did feel anything that could be real. Sure, it felt nice in his embrace. But I can't hold on to that.
    "No, Jimin. there's nothing."  I sigh, not being able to bear making eye contact. His dark eyes weaken, his grip loosening. He's letting me walk away.

I felt words tumbling under my tongue, wanting to escape. Oddly, I feel how much I ruined the hopeful atmosphere.

Jimin follows after me, he's picking up his pace.
"Stop it Jimin."
He doesn't say anything and continues behind me. I panic. I don't understand what's going on. What are all these emotions swirling through my head?
I start to walk faster down the hall way. One exit of the school is in sight. I start to make a run for it when I feel Jimin grab my arm roughly. He sounds me around and opens his mouth to speak but before he can say I grip Jimin's shoulders and knee him in the balls. He groans kneeling over and holding his crotch in agony. "FUCK," He exhales.
    "You.... you disgust me," I breathe the lie.
Quickly I grab my bag and fly out the exit.