Chapter 1
♥♥♥ Back to Basics ♥♥♥
Here I was again, intensely walking down the street, but this time I was drinking coffee. I began to look at other people also walking down the street then something caught my eye. It was another twerking human being and then I realized who it was, it could have only been none other than my twerking soulmate. The one that I accidently bumped into the street. We both twerked to each other, “What’s your name?” I asked the strange kid who was wearing a bunny costume while twerking. He looked at me nervously, “I don’t have a name. Even if I did I won’t tell you because I don’t know you.” I felt tears forming in my eyes, “But… But we’re soul mates.” The guy looked at me with a puzzled look on his face, he randomly opened his mouth and words came out saying, “Lady, calm yourself you twerk over to me saying that we are soulmates. Like no. #sorry” And with that he twerked away. I looked down at the ground and sadly twerked to my house. I glared at the door and without touching it, the door opened and I fell on the ground. “2 spooky 4 me” I thought. I got up off the ground, and went to bed although it was only 3 pm.
♥♥♥ 4 hours later ♥♥♥
I sat up in my bed remembering that I forgot to shut the door. So i got up from my bed and walked over to the door. Not realizing that 3 squirrels, 4 birds, 2 mice, and 5 Jehovahs witnesses were in my living room. One of them were holding a bird in their hand and were talking to the others about how precious God’s creatures were. I galloped over to my electric guitar and turned on my amp to the highest volume setting and started majestically playing. They all screamed and ran out of my house, and I smiled. I smelled something burning, and I looked over to my side to see a candle burning. I read what smell the candle was, and it was called, “Woah man, I’m a burning candle”. So that was pretty cool. I thought, “How can my life get any better than this?” Then all of a sudden, my leg broke off. So I flew to the hospital. As i was lying on the hospital bed, a doctor walked in and said something horrifying. “I’m sorry girl without a name on her birth certificate. Your leg broke off.” I looked at him with my mouth hanging open, I had to ask him, “So you’re saying that my leg broke off?” He nodded, and I was still so unsure about what was happening to me. “Yes. So that means no more twerking until your leg grows back.” I started to cry. I really did miss my burning candle. A nurse strutted into my room and asked, “Do you need anything? A candle? A candle? Or maybe a candle?” I looked at her surprisingly, can she read my mind? I looked dramatically out the window then replied, “Yeah, some food would be nice.” The nurse questioned what I said, “Really you don’t want a candle?” I thought some more about what I really wanted. Candle or food. Out of nowhere the nurse begins to do the Can-Can dance and singing, “Tell me what you want, what you really really want!” Annoyed I just replied, “I JUST WANT SOME DAMN FOOD WOMAN CALM YOURSELF.”
