i thought i changed

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it happened again.
i don't know how i'm supposed to make it a second time.
write forty poems on how i don't feel well,
but still steal stares at you from any angle.
act like i don't care, to be eaten alive once more.
i thought it would get easier to get better.
it's hard when there is no will.
easier to let myself fall.
a part of me almost doesn't want to,

but the feeling's too strong.

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