Eyes full of stars | ✔️

Chapter 32: Never let me go

"And the arms of the ocean are carrying me

And all this devotion was rushing over me

And the questions I have for a sinner like me

But the arms of the ocean deliver me"

-Florence + the Machine

*

Sebastian and I were laying, embraced, on my sofa, watching television, when Felicity and Sherlock walked in.

"Hi" she greeted.

"Hi" we responded.

She gave some fresh water to Sherlock and ran to sit on the table in front of us.

"I need to tell you guys something" she said, her back straight, her hands on her lap, her eyes serious. "Okay" she cleared her throat. "Erm... Toby has invited me to attend her son's birthday party in Nantucket. And I said yes."

I sat upright, hitting Sebastian's abdomen with my elbow by mistake. He growled but I ignored him. "What?!" I exclaimed. "And when is it?"

Felicity opened her mouth to speak, but Sebastian preceded her. "Twelve days from now" he said, toneless.

Both of us turned towards him. "Sebastian...?" I murmured, surprised.

He sat upright too, stretching out his arms, and looked at me. "Daisy called me and invited us as well" he admitted. "But I replied that I had to ask you first. I wasn't sure if you liked the idea, you know."

I blinked in disbelief. "When were you going to tell me?"

There was a long pause before he responded. "I had the feeling that I needed to wait until we were there."

My silence pushed Felicity to stand up and leave us alone. "You were going to take me there without me knowing, weren't you? As a part of our so called 'romantic trip'?"

When he said nothing, I sharply got up and headed to my bedroom. Sebastian followed me.

"Hey, I'm sorry, okay?" he said walking behind me. "I want to see Daisy and Robert again, but I was afraid that you would have said no."

I started taking my clothes from the laundry basket and folding them on the bed. "No harm in asking" I mumbled.

"I didn't want you to feel uncomfortable" he insisted.

I turned all my body towards him "Well, if only I knew before finding myself in her house, at her son's party, where there will be Toby, Amanda and a bunch of people I don't know... maybe yes, I wouldn't have felt that uncomfortable. But, since you meant to surprise me... !" I left the sentence unfinished to highlight my sarcasm.

Sebastian took a deep breath. "Lily, I'm sorry." He put his hands on my shoulders and looked me straight in the eye. "I didn't mean to upset you. I know that it was stupid of me, but... I really didn't know what to do and I fucked up!"

I sighed, closing my eyes. It wasn't a great deal for me, to be honest. I was just very agitated at the thought of meeting Toby's ex-wife, his son and, more probably, of seeing him again very soon. This was just not the way I had imagined my romantic trip in the United States with Sebastian.

"I feel that there's more to it, Sebastian" I said, taking his hands in mine. "This kind of uncertainty is not like you. There's something about this trip that makes you behaving weird. Tell me the truth."

Sebastian looked away and, hand in hand, we sat together on the bed. "The meeting in Boston I have talked to you about" he said, in a cautious tone, "it's actually a job interview." He paused and his eyes met mine again. "I may become the lead architect of one of the biggest architectural firms in the East Coast, Lily."