Eyes full of stars | ✔️

Chapter 35: I bet my life

"I've told a million lies but now I tell a single truth

There's you in everything I do"

-Imagine Dragons

*

I was drinking a glass of orange juice, observing Robert playing together with his friends. That sight made me smile and gave me peace. A real rest from the storm raging in me right now. Despite this, once that Sebastian came back from wherever he had gone, I would have asked him to take me away from that place. Away from Toby.

"Lily!" an urgent voice came.

I turned around to see Felicity running towards me, her face the portrait of concern. I got up instantly.

"Felicity! What's going on?" I put the glass on the table.

She slowed down only to grab my hand gasping "Come with me! Now!" and she pulled me inside the house.

"Hey!" I exclaimed, following her through the house. "Felicity!"

She stopped by the front door and put her hands on my shoulders. Her eyes were deep and black.

"Go and tell Toby how you feel about him" she said.

I frowned. "What?"

Felicity sighed and pointed at something outside the thin window beside the door. It was Toby, pacing by a tree down the front yard, his head lowered, his fists clenched.

"It's now or never, Lily" Felicity whispered, looking at me as I looked at him.

I swallowed and shook my head. I just wanted to get away from there. "I have nothing to say."

"You know very well it's not true. You have so many things to say. I have no doubts that your life and your beliefs changed since Toby showed up and I have no doubts that it is driving you crazy, that it scares you to death. He made you become the woman you wanted to be, he made you feel loved as you have always wanted, but, at the same time, he disappointed you, he pushed you to believe that loving him was wrong. It is NOT wrong, Lily! He needs you to love him. Go. Go and love him. Love him with facts. Love him with words. Love him with all you have, all you can give."

A tear ran down my cheek and I wiped it. I turned my head towards my friend. "What if he doesn't love me back?"

Felicity took a deep breath and caressed my hair. "There's only one way to find out, sweetie" she whispered. "Just go and try."

Before I realized it, my feet were moving and I was walking through the front door and down the path towards Toby. He stopped pacing when he saw me approaching, hands on his hips; his right hand was bleeding but he didn't seem to care. I slowed down and stopped in front of him, looking him straight in the eye, my hands nervously intertwining with one another.

"Toby" I swallowed, "we need to talk."

He rubbed his beard and nodded. "Yes" he said, his voice broken. He looked exhausted.

Silence fell. I had no idea as to where to begin. I could hear my heart pounding in my ears over the sound of the sea and the wind.

"I'm sorry for that night" I found myself saying. "At Sebastian's house. I didn't mean to..." To what? To have sex with his worst enemy to make him jealous, hurt him and myself? Yes, that was exactly what I had meant to do. I needed to change the sentence. "I had no idea you would have come after me. It was embarrassing."

He shrugged. "Well, at least that made your intentions clear."

I frowned. "What is it supposed to mean?"