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4

Monday, June 11, 2018
1:09 am

  I've been thinking about starving.  But I eat so much that I don't think I can.  I'm going to see if I can make it through a day.  I need too.  I've tried before but I failed.  I'll try again, and this time, I'm going to make it through a day.  I have to cut myself 50 times if don't.

9:38 am
My stomach has stopped growling.  I've been sitting here for a little bit just thinking.  Not like edgy teen stuff, just how to stay alive but starve at the same time, it's difficult to say the least.  I'm going to sleep now, I'll walk later, maybe.

6:44 pm
  Sleeping all day has its perks.  I haven't eaten at all, though that's all I can think about, I'm going to see if I can find Orphan and watch that, maybe it'll take my mind off.

8:51 pm
  I've made it this far, at midnight I'm going to fix some pizza bagels, or some chicken. Or something.  I'm debating wether or not to throw it up afterwards.  Maybe I should, I want to.  I'm going to.  Because all I can think of right now is food.  I want to eat but at least I have some self control.

11:08 pm
  It's almost time.  I think I'm going to purge afterwards, I also came up with a scheduled as to when I would eat, and how much I would eat.  I need to write it down and work out the smaller details as well.  My stomach has started growling again as well.  But I'm going to go ahead and make the schedule.  Bye for now.

~~Daxx~~