The Good, the Bad, and the Crazy. //+//A Complicated Love Story//+//

Chapter 33: Mary.

The dark water of the Ohio River glistened below me. The rain fell and soaked through me clothes, making me shiver. The polices shouts were drowned out by the hard drip-drop of the rain. Knowing that in a few minutes I would jump and then I’d fall, and then I’d sink, and then I’d be dead and it would be over. All the hazy feelings when I haven’t had a drink, all the crazy thoughts, all the confusion, all the lies, and everything I won’t miss will be gone. The lists of things I will miss is much shorted than the list of things I’ll be happy to get rid of.

I’m just not sure which list Branson’s on yet. I love him but that doesn’t help when he kisses Layla. I think I’m going to put Branson on the list of things I won’t miss and the way I love Branson on the list of things I will.

Bryan of course I’ll miss. Sam, Aaron, Charlie, too. Maybe even Sophia and Kate. And Miss. Catch, she had been terrible to me but not nearly as bad as my father, and she was the closest thing to a mother I had. I loved her in some twisted, crazy way. I’d miss her.

My father, I won’t miss him, that bastard. Layla, I won’t miss her, I hope I go to haven so in sixty years or so I won’t run into her. All those kids at school, I won’t miss them. The way that people crossed the street when they saw me coming, I won’t miss that. The list goes on and on.

A familiar voice calling my name made me look up from the dark water. I looked across the river to were Branson stood with Miss. Catch, Bryan, Sophia, Kate, Aaron, Charlie, and Sam.

Some of them were crying and others just looked mad at me.

“Mary!” Branson called again. He was getting closer; while the rest of them were just blurs in the drops of rain he was becoming clearer. He was climbing the bridge. His loud voice reached me like no one else’s did. It stung me too.

“Go away Branson. I don’t want to see you.” I order.

“If this is about Layla, then you have to understand. She told me that she’d tell the truth if I kissed her one more time. I thought she was telling the truth, my mistake.” He said inching closer. He was about twenty feet from me now.

“Be careful.” I sad when his foot slipped. I wasn’t going to let him talk me out of this. It wasn’t just him and Layla that bothered me, it was my entire life, I was just done feeling things, I wanted to be done. I couldn’t hold any more emotion inside me, I couldn’t do it, I wouldn’t do it.

“Mary, I love you. You know that. And if you jump, I’m already here. I’ll jump.”

“Branson!” I screamed “That isn’t funny! You must never jump! No matter what! You must never give up, you must never give in! Promise! Promise me Branson! You owe me that much!”

He just starred at me, rain dripping on him until he was glistening in the moonlight.

“Promise!” I screamed.

He shook his head “Do you see Miss. Catch?” He took another step closer to me “She’s sober right now, no matter how much she doesn’t want to be. You know what she said to me? She said that she couldn’t wait to see your face when you saw her, she said that she hoped you’d be so proud of her. She did that for you.”

“One person cares. Great.” I mumbled, I wasn’t letting him talk me out of it. I was jumping and then I wouldn’t worry anymore, I wouldn’t do anything anymore.

“Bryan is down there crying her eyes out, you’re like a sister to her.” He took another step towards me “Charlie, you know the big one, almost cried at the mental hospital today when he heard what Layla had done.” Another step towards me. With every word and every step he broke me down just a little bit more. “Sophia and Kate don’t know what to think. They’re just kids, all they know is that this girl they thought was crazy ended up being the one they’re brother loved. If I’m happy, they’re happy. And I can’t be happy without you.” Two more steps this time “Aaron is putting on a strong face, like Aaron does best, but I know, and you know, this is killing him inside.” Three steps “Sam found Bryan through you, he’s as grateful as anyone could ever be. Plus he loves you like a sister.” Four steps and he was only an arm’s length away from me now. “And one more thing you need to know before you jump off this bridge is what the doctor told me this morning. He said he was sure because of a urine test they took. You’re pregnant, Mary. You’re pregnant with my baby and I know I should be freaking out, but I can’t tell you how happy I am.”

“Pregnant?” I asked.

“Pregnant.” He said.

My stomach suddenly felt much heavier, and my existence much more important.

“So if I throw myself off this bridge, I’d be killing our baby too?”

He smiled a sad kind of smile “Pretty much.” He held out his hands “Just say you’ll stay with me, Mary. Say you’ll stay with all of us. If you won’t do it for you then do it for me and them, and you’re baby. I love you Mary,” He chocked out the last words “You can’t leave me here without you.” Tears rolled down his face and it was hard to see through the rain but I knew that tears in what they were “You have to stay…for me. They need you, the baby needs you…I need you.” He tried to wipe them away.

He had done it, he had convinced me.

“Don’t.” I said, grabbing his hand and he took the opportunity to steady me, “You don’t have to hide from me.” I said “I love you too.” I threw myself at him and it was then that my foot slipped from the side of the bridge in the hard pouring rain and I fell.