[ONGOING] Nothing could make Jaebum open up, he couldn't share his feelings, he couldn't show his emotions, he believed that he would never feel the things other people feel.
But then a boy moves into town, and Jaebum notices new feelings within hi...
He smiles sweetly at me, eyes almost closing as his cheeks were pushed up again. I feel my hand start to shake slightly, and that horrid feeling in my stomach won't go away.
"J-Jaebum, Im Jaebum." I almost choke out, I could feel my face go hot after that. What's happening to me?!
"Hyung, are you okay?" Bambam asks, chuckling nervously. I look over to him and raise my eyebrows. Why wouldn't I be? Do I look weird or something?
I quickly glance around with my eyes and see my friends staring back at me with contorted faces. I notice the atmosphere and mumble out a "yeah" before turning around and walking away.
I take this time alone to think about how fucking stupid I looked just now.
The feeling in my stomach starts to go away, and my heart beat slows down, but what I know for sure...
I've never felt like that before.
And no matter how hard I try to push the thought away, I can't. This has to be some kind of feeling.
I clutch my chest where underneath my heart sits. Why'd you do that?
***
"Hey, are you okay? This morning was... weird." Jinyoung, my best friend, asks. He sits in front of me and places his lunch box onto the table.
"Yeah, I'm fine. How was it weird?" I ask, placing my elbows on the table. I lay my head in my hands and raise one eyebrow to make it look like I'm "curious".
Then Jackson walks up to our table, holding his tray of food with one hand. He sits next to Jinyoung, and slides his other arm over his shoulder.
"I saw you blush. Never in our 15 years of friendship, have I ever seen you blush." Jinyoung says calmly, opening his lunchbox as he eyes me down.
"I blushed?" I say out loud, really only for me to hear. Jackson clicks his tongue at me. "Yes you did. And it was weird for all of us to see." He claims with a questionable look on his face. He then looks away from me and instantly starts to eye rape the nicely placed food in Jinyoung's lunchbox.
"Oh." I don't understand.
"Hey guys." I look over to see Mark shuffling cutely to our table, his smile brighter than ever. He sits himself next to Jackson, almost sitting on his lap, and gives me a look.
Did everyone find this morning weird?
He opens his mouth to say something, but is interrupted when Jinyoung shoves an olive between his lips. "Shush it."
I ignore them because at this point, I don't feel like talking, and start to look around the cafe.
My eyes glance around at the different faces, all smiling and conversing happily. Happy. I wonder what that feels like.
"Wait a minute, where are Bambam and Yugyeom?" Jackson questions. Mark shrugs as he takes a bite from an apple, and Jinyoung simply doesn't answer.
I look around the cafe until I spot them. They were hugging and laughing with some people. I close my mouth tight, lips forming a straight line. They usually sit here with us, so it's weird seeing them at a different table.
My eyes drift to the two people with them. It was Youngjae and someone much bigger than all three of them, probably a senior.
They were awfully close. Too close to be just friends.
Youngjae is leaning against the others chest, and when he lifts himself off, I can see the guy has his hand on Youngjae's thigh.
His thigh.
Boyfriend?
The guy then starts placing kisses on Youngjae's neck. Definitely boyfriend.
Youngjae giggles at him, his eyes looking soft and... I don't know how to describe it. He then leans forward, and places a kiss on the other's lips. I feel something churn in my stomach.
No. You better just be hungry.
I look back to my friends in front of me, and quickly take one of Jinyoung's spring rolls from his lunchbox. "Hey!" He tries to snatch it back, but I shove the whole thing in my mouth before he can.
"You're acting really weird today, Jaebum." He sighs, I simply hum and glance back over to the couple. I want to keep on looking at them, I don't know why, I just need to.
My stomach is starting to feel hot, I feel hot.
"Dude, you are really red. You wanna go to the clinic or something?" Jackson asks, waving his hand in front of my face. I chew the rest of the food in my mouth and raise my eyebrows.
"I think I feel sick." I blurt out. I don't know what I'm trying to do, but these weird feelings are starting to be too much for me.
"I- I think there is something wrong. Something wrong with me." I look down at the table, my stomach still doing flips as images of Youngjae kissing that dude replay in my head.
"I think you are sick. You're making no sense right now." Jinyoung sounds harsh, but he is right. I take another glance at the couple and bite my lip harsh.
"Oh- You found the boys! Youngjae and his boyfriend are there too... They started dating over the summer. BamBam and I don't like him but Youngjae said he was a good guy." I turn to look at Mark and frown, my heart clenching at the word boyfriend.
Ugh! Damn confusing heart.
"I think I should go to the clinic." I mumble, rubbing my hands against my face. This is all too much for me, I think I'm going to throw up.
Mark stands up, walks over to me and gently grabs my arm. I stand up and let him lead the way. My brain feels like mush.
We walk past Youngjae's table and as we do, I don't miss the couple holding hands. A heat wave hits my body, my stomach burning at this point. Mark rubs my back as I groan.
What the fuck?!
~~~
Poor poor Jaebum is confused 😔
But seriously, imagine never having emotions... it must really suck.
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I also hope quarantine is going okay for you guys!!! 💗💗💗💗
