Before I Go ➸ L.H

16

Selena...

With my surgery coming up just around the corner, my family begins to come together a little more each day. School hasn't been an issue, but I find it useless to be enrolled when I'm not there. My parents agreed to letting me switch to online school since I'll be in the hospital.

I look at my calendar and smile as I remember I only have about two months left until I get to visit England with Cher.

"Selena you ready?" I hear my mother call from downstairs.

My father and Cher are still asleep while I go with my mom to be taken out of school.

"I'll be down in a second" I respond as I slip on my flats.

With one last look in the mirror, I secure my wig and make my way downstairs to my mother waiting by the door. She opens the door and we enter the car.

The only thing worrying me as we drive up the street is the possibility of having an extremely unwanted encounter with Luke or one of the other boys that may decide to bombard me with questions of my sickness. I found it absurd that Luke would tell them of my condition in the first place. He told me he wouldn't and knows how personal it is.

"You know Selena, your father and I love you very much. And we're really happy with your decision." My mother cuts me out of my thoughts.

"Love you guys too" I reply hesitantly.

It's been a while since I've heard them use those words towards me. It's becoming a little easier to hear, not as easy to respond to. She feels the tension and stays silent for the rest of the ride. My school comes into view and I'm happy to finally be taken out of this horrid place.

We step out of the car and walk towards the front. I avoid any glances I receive and follow my mother into the front office. I sit on the old chairs as she talks to the staff about my switching of schools. About ten minutes go by and they snap me out of my thinking.

"I'm going to fill out some paperwork, they said to go clear out your locker and return your books"

I groan in response. I want to avoid the hallways of this place, never know who could be in them. I tug on my sweater as I walk down the empty hall, thinking of all the bad memories that linger. My locker of course has to be so far down away from the office. My finger glide over the lock and open it. I begin to grab the few textbooks, old binders, folders, papers and pencils that are smashed between each other. My arms are full and I manage to close the locker, but fail to keep everything in place. I trip and land onto the floor, my things scattered everywhere.

"Need some help with that?" An all too familiar voice asks, I don't dare to look up and meet his eyes.

"No, I've got it" I lie, hoping he'd get the hint and go away.

"Selena please let me explain, I'm so-"

I place my hand up and don't let him speak.

"No, I get it you were mad about the song, but telling them that was just low. Even for you"

"I know and I'm sorry, I was just angry and it came out too quick. I just want to make it up to you, especially since you did what you did"

He must be talking about making his song a hit with a huge boy band. I shake my head and begin to pick up my things again. He goes to help, I don't stop him.

"Really Selena, thank you. The guys and I actually have a shot at becoming big because of you" His lips turn up slightly and I can't help, but give into him again.

Something about his happiness and smile just does something to me. I can't stay upset with him, my secret was bound to come out sooner or later. Slowly I pick myself off the ground and begin to walk back to the office, Luke trailing behind me. He walks in with me and we give all of the textbooks back and toss away the old papers and binders.