The Truth of the Matter

12. The Wrath of a Best Friend

I quickly padded over to the door, the expectant visitor impatiently rapping on it rather heavily. I hoped it would be Truth, coming back to continue our conversation. It was too high of a hope. 

I swung it open to find Molly standing there in denim skinny jeans and a Barca soccer jersey, hand on her hip, foot jostling up and down, her red hair flowing wildly down her back, scowl on her face.

"Molly?" I blurted out ineloquently.

She may have been Truth's best friend but we never really hit it off. I thought she was conceited, a little rude, and I just couldn't fathom how she and Truth had anything in common.

Molly was visceral and impulsive while Truth was a seeker who needed a detailed ten point plan before going grocery shopping. Molly very rarely thought of anyone besides herself and how people fit into her life while Truth had made it her life's purpose to help others.

"Shut up you smug British bastard. Stay away from Truth. She's doing just fine without you" she warned me, stepping over the threshold and stomping up to me, fists clenched and gaze burning directly into my eyes.

I questioned her sarcastically

"Are you going to threaten me from the hall where there are witnesses or are you going to come inside?"

I stood aside and motioned for her to pass. She stalked inside, the anger radiating off of her in waves.

She continued on ranting

"She hadn't thought of you in months! She was doing so well! She had been leaving the damn house. She had been on a few dates too. She was dancing and buying drinks. She didn't feel bad about herself for just one fucking night and then she meets you again. So, what? You have sex and then she comes home crying. What did you do to her? Did you tell her she wasn't good enough for you again? Because it was such a hit last time"

I wasn't sure how much to divulge to Molly. I hadn't taken advantage of Truth. A bubble of anger was rising to the surface within me. I was over being treated like a bad person. I had done what I thought was right and it was killing me.

I knew that she wasn't ready to be with me. I only wanted to love her while she let me. I wasn't expecting anything in return. What could Molly understand of an act so sacrificial?

She wouldn't even sacrifice the tv for a night.

I very slowly and explicitly explained

"I did not take advantage of Truth. Yes we had sex. But I asked her to stay. I offered her my whole self Molly, multiple times. I didn't ask for marriage. I don't care about that. I just wanted to make sure I wasn't wasting my time. Truth doesn't want her time wasted either. You know that scares her, the thought of a wasted life. You can't pretend like she's the only one being hurt in this situation"

Her eyes flashed and she raged

"You think that I care about you at all? You're the asshole who threw away my best friend.

You think you know her so well? You think you know why she left? Because that's the only thing she has ever known. Leave before they leave you. You left her because you didn't want to wait for her to be ready! She trusted you and you just gave up!"

I tried to interrupt to defend myself but she threw up one finger in my face and I held my tongue as she continued 

"Did you ever hear about her fifth birthday? She had a white cake with red polka dots because we both had chicken pox that month and she wanted her cake to have them too. Her parents swore they would come, and they didn't. That was the last time she heard from them. She hasn't seen or heard from them in twenty three years. Five fucking years old and she had to learn about how shitty people can be. Even people who are supposed to love you."

I was quiet, my anger quickly quenched by pity.

I knew she had some secrets that she hadn't told me. Perhaps she was ashamed, but there was nothing for her to be ashamed of. She had emerged strong and victorious. Then I realized how big of an asshole I really was. Molly was right. I didn't want to wait. I wanted the promise right then. Selfish.

I mustered up softly

"No, she hadn't told me that. I wish she had..."

Molly waved her hand in front of my face

"Did you ever wonder why she didn't tell you? Maybe she never trusted you, or never really wanted you. She realized she actually was wasting her damn time on you. You don't deserve her and you better believe I am not going to vouch for you anymore. I regret ever telling her to go on that date."

I tried to speak up again but she held up a finger to my face again and muttered in a deathly still voice

"Hurt her again and I swear I'll kill you."

I rolled my eyes up and squinted them closed as she shoved past me and slammed my door shut in proclamation of her exit. She had a right to be angry, her best friend was hurting and she wanted to defend her. It was noble of her.

I wouldn't tell Truth what happened, she would probably be upset that Molly had meddled in her business. I rubbed my eyes. It was too early for this.