You're An Angel [Destiel Fanfiction]

Chapter 9

I don't wanna talk. I just wanna end this. Leave me alone.

Deans P.O.V
I walked in to Castiel's house and let me just tell you it was 100 times cleaner than last time. "Cas? Hey buddy, where are you?"
"Uhm.. Just... Just a second Dean!" he called back. I paced the floors for a few moments and finally decided to sit on the couch. I was only sitting for 2 seconds when Castiel came out of the bathroom, and I quickly stood up. "No, Dean it's fine. Sit down."
"Cas no it's too clean. I feel inadequate.. Did I use that word right?" Cas sighed and nodded his head. Hell yeah, I'm getting better at this word stuff. "Dean, I don't feel well. Can we skip our date?"
"Actually Cas, I wanted to talk to you about something."
"Okay Dean.. What is it?"
"You know that I know about the journal. And you also know that I know about the whole 'better off dead' thing. And Castiel, I can't fucking lose you. Alright? I know, I'm not serious at all. I'm a huge goofball all the time. But right now Cas, you have to believe me when I say that if you EVER did that, they'd have to make two graves." Cas just stared blankly at me. Like he was trying to take all this in. He cocked his head to the side and frowned. "Is that all, Dean?"
"No, Cas. I also wanna know what's with all the sweaters?"
"I.. I like sweaters.. That's all.."
"Mhm, and I like math. Now seriously, it's two million degrees outside and you wanna wear that? And then you won't let me take it off? What's to hide?"
"Nothing." Cas starting pulling the ends of his sweater sleeves down past his hands. "I think you should leave, Dean."
"Show me, or I'm leaving forever Castiel. I don't like you hiding things from me." Castiel started to cry. He was shaking. His breathing was heavy and short. "Cas, hey.. Calm down Ca-"
"Fuck you Dean," he mumbled and begun to lift the sleeves on his sweater. There were bandages, lots of them. Too many to count. His wrists were wrapped. He lifted his sweater completely off. There were more on his hips. He shook his pants down to his knees and sat back down. Even more bandages on his thighs. "What is this.." I mumbled. He began unraveling the bandages. There were cuts all over his thighs. Some saying words. Fat, stupid, ugly. There on his hips were deep scars, fresh cuts. But his wrists... God his wrists... My name was carved into the left one. Cuts of all sizes were on the right. I couldn't take my eyes off of my name. My own name.. "Cas-"
"Save it Dean. It's all just pity. I don't need any of it. Everyone looks down on me. 'Oh the kid who gets bullied' 'the kid who tried to hang himself'. Well I'm sick of it Dean," he wiped his eyes, "I'm so sick of it.." He pulled his pants back up and put his sweater back on. "Now you know Dean, I'm just a freak. You should probably just leave.. Everyone else does..." I walked over to Cas and sat next to him. I held him, and he started crying even more. "Cas.. Hey it's okay.. I'm not leaving..." I swallowed. What was I suppose to do? My entire reputation at this school would be ruined. People will just laugh. Hell, they probably already have.
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I'm sorry these chapters are short. I'm trying really hard to make them long, you guys just keep asking to update and. Yeah. I'm trying. 😭
-Lena