Thicker Than Paper

Romance

Magic and electric. Hot and foggy. Lucky and hopeful. Love in the moment. I still feel his fingertip all over. His humid breaths on my neck. Hands in my hair. I doubt I'll ever be able to wipe this goofy grin off my face. I dunk my hand in the chilled water, next to the paper crane. I want to guide it from underneath. I want to do the impossible. With him.

~~~

I feel his hot breaths on my cheek, we lay next to each other in his bed. On top of the covers, the T.V. off. Just us. In the whole house. Just us, his fingers and my experience.

"I just... can't get over the idea of your mom just left for a cruise in Mexico. A little 'hosta la vega baby, be back eventually' and got in the taxi without a second thought." I can't stop a giggle from escaping as Travis attacks my sides.

"You make my mother sound heartless," I sigh, as he stops tickling me, "I think Dandrea deserves a little break, dealing with my little sister and Dad is tough. I just wish she would brought me along."

I flip myself onto him, kissing his jaw, "You'd miss me too much," I hope he can hear the whisper.

"Yeah, and your magic tongue," I pull back a little surprised he said that. When I recover, I feel an evil smile take over my face.

"My magic tongue? I'll show you magic."

I kiss him softly, easing his mouth open until I can slip my 'magic tongue' in and play with his tongue piercing. I slowly trail my hands up beneath his shirt, easing it up on his body. We break apart long enough to lift his and I's off. 

I break our lips again, trailing kisses on his jaw, down his neck, all along twirling his nipples between my pointer and thumb. 

"Phoe-" His moans make me shiver. 

I can feel his erection rubbing on my leg. My own pants get tight. I lick a circle around his nipple, not actually touching it. When I do, I nibble and his back arches, so out chests touch. I love the feeling. Tracing his abs with my tongue, I move down the bed till my face is hovering above his crotch.

Kissing his stomach, my fingers fiddle with the band of his pants. I don't go farther though, looking up at him. His chest is rising fast, and his bottom lip in being worried between his teeth.

"Travis..." 

"Yes. Yes," He nods his head, eyes closeing, and I smile.

 I'm going to be able to taste the boy I really like. Taste my boyfriend. Quickly, I pull down his jeans, down to his ankles, and make his underwear follow.

He's long. Just like how tall he is. And thick. Better then me, that's probably right. I can't stop staring at his wood, imagining what it would feel like. In me. 

Realizing that I'm not just here to stare at him, I begin rubbing the bottom of his shaft. His chest starts to rise and fall faster. Still rubbing up and down his length, my tongue flickers over his tip. I notice his hands fisting the covers. 

My hands move to his balls, slowly massaging. I start to take more of him in. More and more, wanting all I can get before I start to gag. I feel him twitch, so I start to bob up and down. Faster. His body tenses and suck harder, hollowing out my cheeks.

"Phoenix," My name coming from his mouth makes me coil in anticipation. 

I pull on his balls, making his make arch father. He's getting tenser. He's close. So close. 

"Phoeniixxx..." My eyes roll to the back of my head at the sound of his voice. 

Harder faster. I need to taste him. All of him. His hands move to my hair, pulling at my dark locks. Pull my head up. I fight back, shoving as much of him as I can down my mouth. 

Then a feel it. It's sticky consistency shoot in my mouth. His body riding out an orgasm. I pant, pulling back. But I don't stop kissing him. 

'i move back up the bed, grabbing his head with my hands and passionately kiss him. I want him to taste my lust. My desire. I want him to taste himself. 

"Oh my god, Phoenix," His chest still rises unsteadily when I pull back.

I try and ignore the pulsing in my pants. I fall on him, before rolling next to him. I stare at the ceiling for a moment, reliving everything that just happened. 

I turn bck to him, a tired smile on my lips. He looks at me, a grin on his too. I lift a hand, running it through his hair. So soft. So fucking smooth. 

"Speechless," I laugh as he just kind of stares at me.

"Good," i lean in and kiss his nose. Before closing my eys in the crook of his shoulder. I still feel it. I still feel the need. 

Travis must feel it against his leg because he starts to apologize, "Phoenix...I...i don't know if I can...repay the favor. I'm so sorry-"

I kiss his lift gently, "You don't have to do anything. I never want you to feel like you have to do anything. And stop me if you ever don't want to do anything. This is you and i. What we want. Not just a single person," I kiss him again, "But, I'd really appreciate it if I could take a cold shower and borrow some sweatpants."

Travis laughs, and my stomach swirls.

~~~

"Have you done...it? You know, all the way with a guy?" I'm taken back from his question. 

We've been watching 'Beautiful Creatures', my head lying on his chest. We've never talked about this before. Is this how these talks go? If I tell him will he get mad and break up with me? I bite my bottom lip. Hesitation.

"Um...yeah. Last year, in Vegas," I close my eyes, knowing he can't see them and hope he doesn't call me a whore. Or a slut.

"Oh," His reply is almost worse, "I think I heard about that. T.J. told me, I think. I didn't know that was your first time."

I cringe. Of course, they all fucking talked about it, "Uh, yeah. I don't know why I ever told them anything ever. I guess I figure, wheres a better place to...experiment," I instantly know that's the wrong word to use, "than vegas? What were the chance I'd see them again? I guess, when I was questioning, what I did there just solidify it. There was no denying it. I was gay. Even if i still liked girls. I was gay."

I feel his chest vibrate as he hums, "Why'd you come out when you did? Like how you did to me, I guess."

I sigh and keep my eyes open, "Even though I knew I was gay, I knew I liked girls. Before I ever learned the word. Bisexual. I always thought I could just push the 'gayness' away, and settle with a girl. I guess you wouldn't really understand since you know, you're all gay. Oh my god, I'm sorry that came out so wrong!"

His chest dances a little with his laugh, "It's fine. It's true."

"Anway, I felt, like a liar. If I came out. Like I'd be causing too many problems, I should just stick with being normal on the outside, even if it was only half true inside. But then, I don't know, under that lit up tree at the party you looked...different. Calm, and sweet, and beautiful. And my gut just kept screaming at me, so I kissed you. Then I felt intensely bad for kissing you, and I needed to give you an excuse. By the way, I only had like two cups of the spiked punch. I was definitely not as drunk as I kept claiming to be." Now it's me laughing, and I trace a circle around his belly button, scared to look up at him.

I feel his lips on my head, and I pray it isn't a break up kiss, "I figured that. But it's okay. I was happy."

"huh? Why would you be happy a psychopath attacked you?"

He chuckles and twists a lock of my hair, "Not a psychopath. A cute, sweet, nice, perfect young man. One I definitely preferred to kiss me over all his friends."

We laugh together and go back to watching the movie. At first its kind of an uncomfortable silence, but eventually it becomes warm and inviting. His arms around my waist, my head on his chest.

"This is a good one month, I think." I close my eyes with a smile, letting his words sing me into sleep.