Without The Love ||Jiley||

Chapter 27

Laying on my bed, I hear a soft knock on the door. My mom walks in. I forgot to lock the door when Justin left. "Hey, I'm going to the gasstation. Will you be fine home alone?" Mom says to me. I dry my eyes. "Yeah sure." I say, with a soft but hearable tremble in my voice. "What's going on between the two of you? Justin didn't seem to know." She says walking into my bedroom. I'm not really in the mood to update her with my life. "Nothing." I sniff. She places her hand on my shoulder. "There's obviously something wrong." She emphasizes on 'something'. "Just go mom." I nag and turn away from her. She sighs. "I'll be back in 20 minutes. Your dad's at night shifts again." She says as she walks away. Defeated and lonely I stare outside from my bed. The peaceful way that the trees move in is hypnotizing me. The starting rain crashes against my window. It's getting darker by the minute. I feel like I'm losing grip over reality. How is Liam doing? Those kinds of questions creep into my head. I scroll down my contacts, ticking on Liam's name. I send a short text.

Hey. How are you doing?

Almost at the exact same time he responds.

I'm fine. Why are you texting me?

In the back of my head I knew he was gonna say that.

Just bored.

I swallow the lump in my throat. This is hopeless.

Oh ok.

I throw my phone across the room and hide my face in my palms. All the things I did wrong in my life, just got thrown to the surface again. All the shit that I've done to people, the shit I thought I burried deep enough so it wouldn't bother me again, got shot up towards my broken sky. And hell yes it hurts. How come that people are so vulnerable when it comes to emotions? How come that things people say or do, can lead to someone's death? It feels like madness is creeping into my mind. If it was up to me, I would take the first train to wherever the wind blows and shut myself off the social media and friends. I wrap myself up as I try to think about a way out of this. An enormous thunder trembles through the house. Startled, I walk towards the window and look outside. Dark, threatening clouds pull over the sky as huge raindrops fall down upon my window. I decided to sleep for a while, dreaming is my only peacefull world.

I jump up after a heavy thunderbolt. I look outside. It's already getting dark and the rain hasn't stopped yet. I look at my fake golden watch. 9:17 pm. I sigh. All alone in this house; what am I supposed to do? Maybe I should ask Katy to come over. I know being alone won't do me any better. I dail her number. "Hello?" She picks up happily.  I breathe in. "Hi it's with Miley. I wondered if you could come over tonight." I say slowly, letting out the breath I held in. "Uhm. I'm at Jessie's right now. I kinda promised to stay over the night too." She says, I can almost imagine her biting her lip now. "Oh okay. Maybe I'll be better off alone then." My mood changes to an angry one. "What? What do you mean with that? Don't you think we care about you? Justin doesn't even know why you guys are fighting. You're pushing us away, Miley." She says on a raised voice. I know my life won't get any better so I hang up without saying anything. I nuzzle into my pillow. I hear a door slamming closed as the trembles pierce through my door. "Miley!" My dad's voice rings through my ears. I widen my eyes and stand up. The anxiety in his voice thrills through my brain, as if I almost felt the hurt he has. "Miley!" He yells again. I hear fast paced breaths coming closer. I rush to the door. I find my father halfway the stairs breathing heavily, his hair messed up and cheeks wet from I guess tears. What happened? "What? Why are you crying?" I ask him as I step closer. He walks the last few steps up and hugs me tightly. "It's your mom.. she-" He stops and tries to control his voice. My heart rushes and sweat breaks out on my face. "Mom what?" I say hasty and look into his eyes. Completely out of breath, he tries to continue. "She's in the hospital. She had an accident on the road." He drags out. A sudden impuls shoots through my veins. My mouth gets dry. I push my dad away and rush down the stairs. I open the frontdoor after grabbing the car keys and find myself in the stormy weather outside. Trees bend angrily over as the rain slams against my heated face. I run towards the red cabrio and get in. "Miley! Wait!" My dad shouts but he was too late. I start the engine and hit the gas pedal.

Within no time I arrived at the hospital and randomly parked the car on the parking lots. The huge building rises above me, it's lights shining down upon me. I slam the glass doors open and walk to the administration. "Where's Tish Cyrus!?" I shout at the startled lady wearing a red blazer and a weird white shirt underneath it. She checks the computer as I impatiently tick with my fingers on the white bar. Big, hot tears stream down my face. "She's in the intensive care but you can't go there you'll-" I didn't understand the rest of what she said because I already ran towards the multiple rooms. I slam the first one open, disturbing doctors and nurses. The second door slams open, no one in there. The third door slams open. I almost felt myself fainting when I saw my mothers blonde curls with wisps of red liquid in it. "Mom!" I scream out as I run towards the bed. Her face is almost covered in her blood as she lays there, motionless. Two doctors pull me away. "Sorry ma'am you can't stay here. Family or close ones will get informed about the situation as soon as possible." A grey haired man in the 50's says to me as they throw me out of the room. I assumed they locked it, because there was no way getting into that room again. I drop onto the floor and curl up. I feel my dad's reassuring voice speaking up. "Let's just wait here." He says, with a trembled voice. I stand up. Will today's conversation with my mom be the last one? If it is, I won't ever forgive myself for being so distant and harsh to her. How can I ever live with myself if one of parents would die?