I hadn't seen mom after that. Dad came home, sullen, obviously gotten the news. Penny seemed okay, but those eyes were as empty as our apartment felt like. It was a ghostly feeling, sitting there in my room after I made dinner for us all. It felt so cold without my mother. I hadn't noticed, but it seemed like the homey warmth and noise was always coming from her. She was the source. I didn't realize it until then. Until it was too late.
She had left.
And that left me feeling indifferent. So this was my future? Looking after my little sister, my cancerous dad, my empty home, while struggling with my own life? My own crisis? Was this the way I was supposed to live?
Did baba even work anymore? Had he gotten fired? I was scared to know I probably had to have the responsibility of bills and getting the food on the table. In a frantic haze I went out of my room to get some water. Baba sat in the dining area. He was drinking coffee.
I halted, turned to him and simply stood. He was a crooked little thing. Hallow now, as if life was drawn out of him.
I cleared my throat and those dark orbs traveled slowly to mine. He raised his eyebrows.
"Did you get fired?"
Baba sighed, nursing the cup in his palms. "No." He exhaled. "They understood my reasons."
I sat down before him. "What happened? What's going on? Are you really sick?"
Baba looked down his cup and I imagined that the dark liquid was as dark as his eyes. He was breathing heavily, and he seemed tired. Old. Very old.
"I was taking painkillers for my back. Pancreatic cancer is lethal especially when noticed late. And in my case," Baba looked at me. "I was too late."
"Your...pancreas?"
"An organ located here." My father gestured to his abdomen. "Anyway, I wasn't fired. But it doesn't matter. I'm going to quit."
"What, why?"
"Why?" Baba looked at me. "Because I'm dying. And I want to spend time with my family until that one day comes."
"But, there's chemo. And there's lots of other-"
"No." He sighed. "No it's too late. If I'm lucky I'll be alive until next summer. Anything after that would be a miracle."
"You don't believe in miracles." I huffed, feeling deflated. "You believe in hard work and dedication. You believe in never giving up."
"You don't know what you're talking about." My father held the cup sternly.
"I know what I see, and I am watching my hero giving up."
"Well," Baba said submissively. He took a sip before gazing at me amused. "Cancer does that to you. Giving up, that is."
"Have you seen her at least?" I talked into the phone. I could hear my brother sigh, a deep exhale that gave me the answer before he had even spoken.
"I've been everywhere. Even our relatives got no idea. But she has to show up some time. You and I, sure she could leave. But what about Penny?"
"She's stupid. Stupid people don't care whether they leave their five year old."
"Don't call our mother that. Look at it from her side."
I narrowed my eyes and if Alex could see me he'd shiver.
"You sound like baba. And I have. Her perspective, mildly said, is the worst perspective that even a blind man would turn it down as ludicrous. Alex, I got school and then I have to work on some project. Could you pick me up at the library?"
YOU ARE READING
Partners In Crime [On Hold]
Teenfikce~Quotes from the book~ "If he's evil, be Satan himself." "Can't handle the fat, can't handle the love." "I was literally two seconds away from starvation. Really, feel my ribs. They're hollow." "You were going to use mom's vase on me? You're suici...