Firron (LOTR Fanfiction)

Chapter Ten

       Frozen feet, numb faces, trembling arms and a quickly diminishing warm spark of hope was all our party had known these past two days. Keeping a watchful eye was hard as frozen slush pounds into every exposed portion of my body, my eyes desperately trying to open only to get slammed by harsh, bitter cold. The pads and underside of my belly were stiff and sore from the large drifts of snow as we continued at a crawling speed towards the summit of the pass. Gandalf was leading the way through the piled snow presently as I followed behind him using my girth to help widen the path for my small members. Most had fallen silent from sheer exhaustion; even our mind speak had dwindled to silence, besides the somewhat routine call out to make sure everyone was still alive and unhurt. Being trapped inside my mind alone was no strange thing to me, this cold mountain covered with snow though was bringing up memories I would have liked to forget.

49 years ago

        I woke with a start and sat up quickly. There... I know that feeling; its glowing ember, its small warmth. It would grow, and grow until it consumed me from the inside out. Like many times before I had sought out a remote piece of mountainside to endure my Blood Cycle. There would be no rest for me these next two weeks, I sighed as I begin my climb up the mountains face and its peak. This time would be the worst yet I presumed, as the Blood Cycles previously solidified that awareness; it was nature's way of making sure our species reproduced. Stone-Bark had told me that once great feast where held during our Cycle for it was a time for males to prove themselves to their potential partner. A female would go into heat, driving her mad with need and painful when it is not met. Many times a male would succeed in proving himself in combat against his intended but others would fail, their lives forfeit to the female. As the Firrons dwindled in numbers, the Blood Cycle was seen as a treacherous time as many would lose their lives to the powerful females, no man, elf or dwarf would ever be capable of achieving this feat. And so, the Kings would loose these Firrons to ravage their enemies and terminate rebellions before they could start. I looked out at the endless white and grey that was around me, aware that no lives were near me and settled in waiting for my Blood Cycles ciaos to begin.

      For the first week or so the slow growing fire was be managed by sleep or a brief run around the mountain, any small game found was quickly dispatched but my hunger did not abate. Slipping into a dreamless sleep I prayed that these next few days would pass quickly and quietly.

      Heat...it flowed through me like a river, burning my body with veins that branched from its scorching core. It was maddening; no water could quench the thirst it brought. A primal need was rapidly taking over the logical thoughts as my body fought for something that I knew would not be sated this night, nor any night following. Anger grew inside splitting the seams of what little control I had left. Why would I never have a life partner...Why was I born to walk this world alone... why did I choose to go on...to fight...to live. Why. Why. WHY. Roaring to the wind, the empty mountain gave no reply, only echoed as if taunting my suffering. Run. My insides screamed for a release that willed me to obey. Bolting, I took off, crossing frozen boulders in a single leap and called the mountain to raise a challenge for me; to be worthy of my presence. It answered, with wind and water and stone. It answered with its freezing winds and solid water to knock me down, to break my spirit, and smash my bones in the ensuing days. It failed. And at its failure my anger grew even more. Was nothing worthy of my power? If a mountain could not challenge me, how would a male? How would he bring me to submit under his might? How could anyone be enough for a mate? There is ...there is none... left. Sanity had broken into the madness momentarily; enough was the polar shift of thought that it caused my feet to faultier and lose purchase from the iced rocks. The mountain welcomed me into its deep abyss as I fell towards its belly and all thoughts went silent as a red fire bloomed even bright inside of me, ready to except the next challenge below me. Death.