Text Convo
Me : hey my friend changed all the names in my contacts. Can you please tell me who you are?
Person : oh wow . What name am I?
Me : Bitch
Person : wow and it's Jessica.... Your ex......
Me : oh well I guess he didn't change this one
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Person : dude I bet your dick is like a tic tac
Me : and that's why your mom breath is so fresh :)
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* my phone rings in class *
Person : who was that your mommy???
* class laughs *
Me : no it was yours
** silence **
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Person : hey fat boy why you so fat?
Fat kid: because every time I fuck your mom she gives me a cookie
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Person : shut up bitch!
Me : call me a bitch again I dare you
Person : bitch!
Me : that's right bitches do what they are told
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Ugly person : Ohh my god I need beauty sleep
Me : nah bitch you need to hibernate
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Me : yo I had my first kiss!
Person : your mom doesn't count...
Me : yeah but yours does!