I didn’t hear from Jessica that night. I actually didn’t hear from her for several days and to be honest it scared me a bit. Going from speaking to her every single day to not at all was, well, it sucked. I knew I shouldn’t be dwelling on it since she could have gotten busy or anything like that but it hurt. I’d only tried texting her once and that was about three days ago. It was a simple messaging basically just asking how she’d been but I never heard back from her. It was weird.
Today I was doing a photoshoot for some fashion magazine. It was more for lingerie than anything which didn’t really phase me anymore. I’d done enough revealing shoots in my short career to not care anymore. I was in my dressing room getting ready for the last look of the day which consisted of nothing more than this black lace racy outfit. As I sat down for my ten minute break my phone suddenly went off, letting me know I had a text. My heart sped up a bit when I saw Jessica’s name flashing across the screen. She was the last person I as expecting to hear from.
‘Hey Julie. I’m so sorry I haven’t been able to speak with you lately. Work has been so crazy but I was wondering if you were free today? I understand if not I just feel awful about not staying in contact with you :(‘
My fingers danced over my screen as I wondered what I should say to her. Was I angry with her? Maybe a little but did that really matter? I was desperate to see her to be honest and a part of me believed that it really wasn’t her fault. I quickly typed out my reply before I could think on it further.
‘It’s okay, Jess. I’ll be done here in about a half hour actually if you want to meet me down here. I can tell them to let you in. We can go grab something to eat afterward or whatever you want to do.’
I waited for her response which didn’t take long at all. I was thankful for that seeing as my manager was already knocking on my door telling me that it was time to go out there.
‘That sounds great :) Just text me the address and I’ll be there in just a few minutes.’
I hurriedly typed out the address to the building I was in before quickly leaving my dressing room. I left one of the staff know that I was expecting someone to make sure Jessie would be brought in. My manager was waiting for me at the end of the hall with this bitchy look on her face that told me I was about to get yelled at for something.
“You’re two minutes behind now, Juliana,” she said in an annoyed tone. “We’d all love to go home if you’re done fooling around.”
I usually had to bite my tongue when I was around her. There were so many things I would have loved to say to her but I also need to keep my job so I just kept my mouth shut and apologized to her as I got in front of the cameras. The usual instructions were yelled out to me. The poses started out simple with me standing and having to turn here and there or look off into different directions.
Eventually, as they always do, the poses started to get a bit more risqué. It was the usual stuff. Crawling ‘seductively’ toward the camera and all that sort of stuff. I saw Jessie enter the room out of the corner of my eye and watched as she sat down in one of the corner chairs offered to her by one of the lighting guys.
I was then asked to lie down and arch my back while I stared at the camera and as I did so, I clearly felt Jessie’s eyes on me. I don’t really know what came over me but with Jessie sitting right there I suddenly felt the need to really show off in front of her. I put everything I had into those poses right then and even my manager was starting to look impressed, which is saying a lot.
By the time I was done, I had a thin sheen of sweat covering me from the lighting and every muscle in my body felt so incredibly tired and achy. I may have overdone it a bit but I was quite pleased that Jessie hadn’t been able to take her eyes off me the entire time. Wait, what am I even thinking? I have to keep reminding myself that she’s taken which I hated. Reality hurts sometimes but, well, I’d be lying if I said I didn’t enjoy it.
