I guess I am kind of talking to you. You gave me some advice. Like I said in poem 24, I can't. I can't draw anymore. I can't listen to music anymore. I can't write anymore. I can barely write anything here. I can't talk to anyone anymore, not even my best friends.
There's this aching and numb feeling in my chest. It rarely goes away. My mouth is dry and there's a lump in my throat. I want to cry but I just...can't. I've lost all interest in the things I used to like to do. I've started thinking about getting rid of a lot of stuff.
I can't take much more. I just want to be done. With everything. And everyone. I like having friends, best friends, but I don't think I can deal with their baggage anymore. My newest best friend...he hasn't answered me for a while. I know he's going through a rough patch but it's killing me that he won't answer. I feel so alone. I just want to feel absolutely nothing for once.
I've thought about finding some alcohol and drinking until I can't breath. I've thought about going to the medicine cabinet and taking a bunch of the pills in the first bottle I come to. I used to be scared...I'm not anymore.
I may be asking a lot but for the few readers, could you comment sometime? Sometimes I'm actually asking questions and I don't get answers. Or I want/need someone to ask, even if they have no clue who I am, if I'm okay. Because no one does anymore...and it hurts.
Jeslyn
YOU ARE READING
Dark Poems
PoetryMy poems about depression, self harm, suicide, anxiety, and anorexia. Things I think about. Maybe a glimpse of what runs through my over active mind. Anxiety is probably the reason I have these thoughts. I write them down just to write them down. Ma...