Small Town Talk

Chapter 2 - Follow me home boy

Chapter 2

Math class was boring doing the same sums I’d done since junior high over and over again was not in any way appetizing. I mean Y plus x equals to z. boom you're done. My first day back at school in general had been hard. The stares, the ‘sorrow’ ‘regret’ ‘pity’ and ‘remorse’ that people held in their eyes for me was unwelcome and left me feeling humiliated. like seriously you've never even spoken to me. bite me!

I still hadn’t called Benjamin. But after the first week. I didn’t let it bother me. My father just died/committed suicide (who really knows anymore) but I deserved to feel a little out of place, right?  I’d done my fair share of dirty over the years but returning back to my life was unavoidable.

 I was okay with the course of things until I heard what Janelle Rachels Birch had to say, or as I refer to her Janelle the devils bitch. I find it oddly fitting.

“Yeah, DUH! Of course I still hate her. I just hate her less at the moment because obviously I feel bad that her dad just died and everything” at that I sunk a little in my seat, some people had no boundaries. “She probably killed him for all we know”  and that ladies and gentlemen was the putdown I was waiting for, the ultimate smackdown and the cherry on top.

I stormed out of class making a bigger scene than I intended to. It seemed like at that moment the world was spinning, tumbling into utter despair and I was on the brink of joining my father in his grave. But if i go down, I swear the grave digger better dig 2 because I was taking the bitch with me. The girl I was 2 years ago was so different to who I am now. How ironic, the girl; who after her mom left promised to live her life to the fullest, had the sudden nerve to end it. Things just needed to stop. My thoughts were spinning around way too fast in my brain; I felt that a fraction faster and the world would spin off its axis!

 ^^^

Half an hour later I found myself sobbing in the science lab storage rooms. A soft knock broke me out of my daze.

“Riva?”  The door cracked open. Bright florescent lights of those in a hospital peeked like little rays of poisoned sunshine. I sighed. i was poison sunshine.My whole life was poison to those around me.you know what? shutup! you're poisoned sunshine!

“Get out Benjamin”

“Why so formal Rivie?” curiosity settling at the tip of his tongue.

“Don’t call me that” my voice came out broken as if jagged pieces of splintered wood were scattered along my throat.

“Fine I won’t call you anything” I was stunned by the bluntness in his tone “are you okay?” he asked

My breath caught in my throat as I shook my head ” No”

We sat there for hours, way after the last bell rang. Anxiously listening to each other stir against the cold and dusty floors. By the time I got hungry it must have been dark outside. I wasn’t surprised no one had found us yet. Hell. I bet no one was even looking. Former bad asses turned good, falling into old habits. Not unheard of. I watched Ben as he sat, my eyes raking him from head to toe. He sat, back against a filing cabinet. One leg straight; the other bent- his elbow supported on his bent knee as he held his face in his hand. His red plaid button down shirt was crumpled and rolled up at the sleeves. His Navy blue military style jacket folded and draped across his lap. When had he become a fashionista? He looked good.really good. GOD damnit ! snap out of it Riva. Whats done is done and gone.

“Why are you here?” I asked, he should have guessed that I would sooner or later question his intentions, I chose later. maybe i liked the company. maybe.. maybe not.