The Brain Transplant

c h a p t e r | s e v e n t e e n

"Stay, you're not gonna leave me
This place is right where you need to be
And why your words gotta mean so much to them
And they mean nothing to me?
So stay, you're not what you're hearing
'Cause I've been watching you changing" - Eden

-

Recap

"Sarah Finn has passed away."

I couldn't feel anything. I couldn't feel my phone slip out of my hand, or Derek rubbing my back. I couldn't hear myself crying, or Tyler telling me it was going to be okay, and that I had to explain what the doctors said. I couldn't hear or feel or think.

And to think if I wasn't so wrapped up in my feelings, I could've gotten to the phone just a minute sooner.

-🧠-

Sarah's body laid lifeless in the hospital bed.

Sarah's family and boyfriend did whatever they could to get to Destin.

Blake was probably going to get kicked out of college for leaving, because he always skips days. His family has a lot of health issues. But he didn't care, because his love for Sarah was too strong.

The rest of Sarah's family just did anything they could to come up and see her one more time.

They all cared so much for Sarah. Once they all got here, they all took turns talking to her, telling her that she's okay now, and she's not going to hurt anymore.

But Sarah isn't dead.

It just isn't possible. Because the girl staring back at me with sad blue eyes can't be dead.

It turns out, Sarah was never dead, she just had the hospital tell me that so I'd come quicker. She knew she was going to die, the hospital did too.

But Sarah wasn't dead, not yet.

Her face was pale, and her eyes had a sad, almost lifeless look to them. But she was still breathing.

Her whole family had talked to her already, so it was my turn. I was last.

"Day, please lis-"

I couldn't bear it. The sound of Sarah trying to explain her death, like I didn't understand. She was trying to change my mood. She knew I was angry, and that anger was sparked by my sadness. "Day please don't be mad-"

"Sarah. I'm not mad at you. I'm mad at me. I wasn't there when you needed me the most. You came up here for me, so I should've been there for you. Instead I was out at the beach, and meeting new friends, all while I was slowly losing a very close one." I shook my head, looking at my fingers that played with the hem of my shirt. "I'm a pathetic excuse of a friend. I'm so sorry Sarah, I really am."

Tyler and Derek were in the room with us. They didn't think I could handle seeing my best friend like this all alone, considering the panic attack I had at the beach and on the way here.

It's funny, really. In a way, it's Derek and Tyler's fault. Of course, I'd never tell them I even thought that. It is true, in a way. It's also my fault, in a way. I know I'll probably be telling myself that for years and years after I lose Sarah.

"Day, please don't think like that. You've been such a great friend, and you didn't know this was going to happen."

I sighed. "Yeah, I know. But I still could've visited the hospital more."

The beeping on Sarah's heart monitor slowed down. Her eyes slowly turned black, lifeless. Her skin was pale, she was very skinny. Her hair looked thin, unlike the voluminous waves she normally had. And her bright blonde hair was replaced by a dull, unhealthy yellow color.

I couldn't quite grasp the fact that Sarah was dying, it just hadn't hit me yet.

The beeping on the monitor slowed down, and Sarah's hand reached out for mine. I held her hand, and she looked me straight in the eyes.

She opened her mouth, but then closed it. The monitor ran flat. Tears pricked in my eyes, the hard reality finally hitting me. Sarah was dying.

I cried.

Nurses ran in and started unhooking her from the machine. Sarah looked tired. The nurses got ready to take Sarah to another room, a room that nobody gets transferred to unless they're dead.

But I never let go of Sarah's hand.

"Sweetheart, I know you don't want to, but you need to let go of Sarah's hand." One of The nurses told me with a sad look on her face.

I took in a deep breath. This was it. I'd never see Sarah again.

I didn't want to let go. But Sarah opened her mouth, and this time she said something.

"Everything will be o-okay, I promise you that... My life will e-end so yours can b-begin again. I love you so much D-Day, you'll be okay."

And with that, Sarah let go of my hand and the nurses rolled her right out of the room.

-🧠-

I'm not crying, you are.

Until next time,
Stella