Never Just Right

Chapter 9

Sometimes memories sneak out of my eyes and roll down my cheeks..
-anonymous

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Shawn pov

Two days ago...

It's been three weeks since she arrived, only a week until they leave. All the teens, me, Clare, Benn and Thali, have been drinking and partying in the woods at night, have talked about the year and just generally getting along better than ever before. Even Benn and Clare got over their whole fighting thing going on to only talking when necessary.

Wich is improvement.

Me and Thali though, we were close than ever. The one night when we were out in the woods in a clearing near a small river, we were sharing a couple of stories and she told me about this one guy. They were close friends when he told her that he wanted something more, and being the person she is, she kissed him for the hell of it. They were full on making out, when he finally pulled away and said,"I said I wanted more, but not from you, I'm, I'm, I'm gay!" He was stumbling over his words.

I must say no matter how funny the story was and how hard I laughed at her, although she didn't like the guy, I was still a little jealous of the guy. I mean who wouldn't want to be making out with a girl like her? No but that's irrelevant, people don't think that way of their best friend right? We again drank lots that night, and waking up with a hangover from hell.

Ahh how something so good have such harsh consequences

Today

The four of us were sitting around a fire when we start to talk about how awkward our first kiss was. When we ask Clare about hers, she takes out two tequila bottles. She gives one to me and takes a sip of the other before giving it to Bennett. He takes a large sip before she begins telling the story of how she kissed Benn, looking really uncomfortable.

"What! Really ? I never knew!" Thalia exclaims, giving Clare a pointed look." Why have I never heard of this? Hmmm?"
"Well you never asked!" She says defensively.

"Or you were just ashamed if it?" I hear Bennett whisper.

"Okay! Thali, why don't you go?" I say, trying to avoid the tension.

So she tells us and we all laugh. I take a rather large sip from the bottle, trying to block out the jealousy forming in my heart.

I mean, why am I jealous? There's nothing going on between us, why would I be jealous of a kiss from like ten years ago?

But I couldn't help but think of that moment in the clearing when I wanted to kiss her, no not wanted to but needed to. For both of our sakes. And, it looked like she wanted me to too.

Someone nudges me out of my thoughts and asked for the tequila. I look to my side, seeing Thalia's big blue eyes staring at me. I hand it over with a small smile. When our hands brush, I swear I hear her gasp. I quickly look at her, just to see her facing Ben and Clare, a light pink tint to her cheeks.

As the night gets older and it's almost time for the moon to begin with its descent, The two older friends make their way to the house, a little tipsy from all the tequila they had. It is quite amusing to watch, especially when they were all flirty and almost all over each other. It was nice to see the two back like old times.

"Aren't the stars beautiful?" Thali asks with a giggle. Oh shit, she is drunk. She never giggles when she's sober, not even tipsy, but she is a giggling, sobbing, talker when she is drunk, and it never turns out good when we're both drunk. I take a swig of the poisonous liquid. And answer with a "jup. "

"Hey you never told us the story of your first kiss?" She stumbles over her words.
"Ya no not going there."
As I say that she turns to look at me, sitting Indian style. "Ahhwww why not? Is somebody embarrassed?" She pouts slightly. Fuck, she looks cute like that.
"No why would I be?" Another sip, this time bigger.

A small giggle escapes her lips, "I don't know, maybe it was horrible" she looks at her hands and shyly says, "If it was that bad, maybe we can redo it, you know. Like pretend this was your first time, and then your 'first kiss' won't be horrible?"

This time I take a enormous sip, almost gulping down half the bottle.
"Why would you want that? I mean it won't change anything. And it was not that horrible. It was just, dumb." I chuckle slightly at the memory.

"Nooooooo it woooonn't, but it will be better." She says with a slight purr.
"I'll think about it, okay? Good."

I'm actually kind of nervous. I don't know why though. I mean it's just a kiss. Yeah kiss between me and Thalia, my best friend. But still a kiss. I could feel that I'm getting drunk, maybe more that a little, and she's completely drunk, I think.

And the night went on. Later the tequila is done and the bottle of wine Thai brought. I know for a fact now that Thai and I are completely wasted.

And it feels fucking amazing!

I am brought out of my reverie when she suddenly starts to speak
"I really missed you Shawny! I always cried when I thought of how sad you were when your brother died and you had nightmares, and the thought of me not being there for you was even worse! I just missed your presence, how good I felt when I was in your arms."

I'm honestly at a loss for words. I never realized how true her words are. How I also missed her, how she was always there when I got frightened of the dreams.
I don't know why, or how or even when, but when I finally come to my senses, our lips are just a whisper against each other, her big blue eyes staring at me with a just a trace of the tears that silently rolled down her cheeks, and that is the moment I close the slight gap between our lips and kiss her.

I kissed her like there was no tommorow. I kissed her like she was my tommorow.

The next morning, when I felt the room spinning, no not the room but the trees? I looked next to me to see Thalia snuggled up against my arm.

And I have absolutely no idea what or how we ended up here.

And the fucking headache gave me a small clue to the 'how' question.

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Oh a slight cliffhanger just for you guys
Thank you for reading. Till next time
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