A Muslim Girl's Smile (ON HOLD)

Do We Realise?

~CHAPTER 10~

All the girls were gathered in the living room, whilst the men were in the dining room. We just sat, speaking and catching up on lost days and years, joking occasionally and looking after Jabir and Jameelah's little sister.

"So, Ameerah," Aunty Umeirah began. She had on her serious mother look, indicating that what she was about to say was a matter not to be taken lightly. I marvelled at how we all felt familiar with each other despite all those years of separation. I looked at Aunty Umeirah who, seeing that all my attention was given to her, continued.

"I heard from Sa'ad that you are working," she said, pausing to take a sip of her cappuccino. I grinned, knowing that Sa'ad had probably informed them on the very first day he had met me itself. He had always been caring and protective towards me, and frankly speaking, I liked it.

"Yes Aunty, that is right," I replied.

"Well, look here Amee," she said."I know you are now a big girl and you probably don't need to be told what to do. Seeing how you have managed to live quite comfortably during all that time, I seriously doubt I have to lecture you about responsibility and all that. You are quite mature, Ma Sha Allah, and I am very happy for you. But aren't you a bit too young for all this?"

Seeing that I was about to reply, she raised her hand to stop me.

"See, you need to work in order to earn money, but wouldn't you be more comfortable if you lived with another family?" she asked me.

I took a deep breath before answering her. Somehow, I knew that this particular topic would be brought up. As if right on cue, Sa'ad walked into the room, followed by all the other men present at that moment. Great, I thought, just great.

"What are you talking about Momma?" Sa'ad asked, sitting down on the carpet and placing his head on his mother's lap.

"I was just asking Ameerah why she doesn't want to live with someone," his mother replied. All at once, everyone looked at me expectantly.

"Well Aunty, I don't want to be a pain in the neck for anyone," I replied, earning me a disapproving frown from Aunty Umeirah. Sensing that she was about to speak, I hurried to continue.

"I know you guys don't consider Jabir and I as trouble, and I am very grateful to you for that. But, Aunty, I want to be autonomous. I want to do everything on my own and stand for Jabir and I. Had my parents been here now, I am sure they would have wanted me to strive to do all I could before seeking help. Allah is here for me, and I fully trust that He won't let me down. I might be young and I don't doubt life has some good and bad things in store for us, but I also know that wherever I am, with whomever, if Allah has decreed that something bad will happen to us, then nobody will be able to prevent this from happening. I want to give myself a chance first... I want to give myself the opportunity of surpassing my abilities, of proving to myself that I can do it. I don't want to sit under a tree one day, thinking that I could have done much better. Trying my best first, that's what I want. And In Sha Allah, with Allah's help, I will succeed."

I ended my tirade and looked at the smiling faces of the people around me. I knew at that moment that they had understood me. Jameelah was looking at me with her signature proud sister look, and I smiled back at her. Thank you Allah for giving me the strength to speak out today.

"Ma Sha Allah, Ameerah," Uncle Shouayb, Sa'ad's father, spoke up. "But I want you to remember that whatever trouble you are in, even the smallest ones, don't forget that we are here. You are like a daughter to us, and it is the responsibility of every single person present here now to look after you. You are right and I fully support you in your choice, but don't ever hesitate to open up to any of us, okay?"