Forbidden Love | Rainbow Six Siege

5. Confused & Alone.

"Look this is going to be weird but it's true." The younger German admitted, rubbing the back of his head with a grave fear lurking within in. Could he even trust Marius with what he was about to say to him? It was a scary thing to admit since it wasn't exactly legal to love someone of the same sex, or even let alone be in a relationship -- period -- with Six's rules. Dominic understood them, but at the same time broke the rule that he was longing not to break.

"Well," Marius began, "is it someone from Team Rainbow? Because that is when you should be worried." This only got Marius a shy look, looking away from the other and shrugging his shoulders. What? What was the shrug of the shoulders supposed to mean to him? Was it? Or was it not? Dominic looked different here.. Shy and seemingly afraid of admitting who it is. Did Dominic think he was going to tell someone? He wasn't.. That's not who he was, and he was trustworthy.. Was he not?

"Well ja.. But.. It's weird. It's not a girl." Dominic admitted after letting out a breath that he wasn't even aware he was holding. Marius furrowed his eyebrows as a response; now they were finally getting somewhere, and Marius liked where it was going. He liked where it was going because what if it was him? What if Dominic was so shy because it was Marius? Marius was listening though, wondering and wondering as Dominic seemed to be pondering.

"I.. Never mind. I cannot say. It's just too much for me right now." Marius let out a deep sigh. All that waiting and for what? For Dominic to tell him that he couldn't say it, and for him to feel even more like a hopeless romantic. Maybe it really wasn't him after all.

"If you think I'm going to tell someone, I would never, Dom."

"I know, but it's weird to admit who it is. What if he feels the same or he doesn't?"

"Well you are saying that like I would go around and tell everyone or even the person you're talking about. I hope you know that I'm not like that. I told you this."

"I know!" Dominic sounded more frustrated that before now, and it seemed to be because Marius kept pressuring him into telling him. This made the older German man feel like complete and utter shit.
"Es tut mir leid.." Marius said as he put a hand on the others shoulder. "I should not be pressuring you to tell me. I do not expect you to. I apologize, again." This only made Dominic swat away his hands, then a small shrug followed along.

"I am being stubborn about it, I know. It's just hard on me."

"I know. I am admitting some feelings for someone of the same sex too. Just tell me whenever you are ready meine freund. No pressure, I promise." Marius said as he rubbed his own arm now out of awkwardness. It was weird that the other was so awkward around him all of a sudden and for no apparent reason; well maybe it was the whole liking someone of the same sex. But why towards Marius? Should he just tell him the way he's been feeling lately? Would it help Dominic open up to him?
"Would it help if I told you who I think I'm falling in love with? Will that help you tell me who it is? Or will it make you feel more comfortable?" Marius didn't break eye contact with Dominic, but Dominic didn't nod his head or even open his mouth to answer.

It was now that he realized how there was almost little to no space between them. Just as Marius was about to speak, Dominic closed the space between them, and before Marius knew it their lips were connected and the space between them seemed like it disappeared so quickly and easily. Marius felt frozen, as if he had never kissed someone before when in reality he had. What was crazy was that he didn't know he could love kissing another so much. It was also highly unexpected, but he didn't wan't the moment to ever stop. He liked Dominic and he never expected the feelings to be mutual between the two of them. Marius closed his eyes and returned his share of the kiss with a hum and a small smile. Their lips moved in sync, and for once the world felt full, and Marius didn't feel so lost and alone like he always does. It was like the hole in his heart was finally filled again with something warm and home-fitting.

Soon enough they had to part for air, but Dominic didn't say a word, and neither did Marius. Their eyes opened almost at the same time. Maruis' heart was beating at what seemed like hundreds of miles per hour while Dominic seemed to be starstruck. However as Marius went to say something Dominic beat him to it: "Es tut mir leid." With the apology escaping his lips, he turned and left the room with a swift close of the door behind him. Marius seemed to be standing there for what seemed like decades. His lips parted and his eyebrows knotted together, and suddenly he felt a warmth leaving his bod. He felt cold and alone.. Did Dominic think this was just another mistake? Did he just want to see what Marius would say in response? Well he can say safely that it worked, he felt lost and alone.. like the warmth he had experienced vanished with Dominic.

Marius fell back onto his bed with his arms spread out and tears welling up in his eyes: Was this all a mistake? Did Dominic even care about him? Was this just a game to the other? Maybe Dominic was lost too, just like Marius.. But Marius felt like there was something more going on. Maybe Marius was just his little test, or this was just a sick prank. Dominic liked to pull those; plan them with Elias and then humiliate someone from Team Rainbow. Usually it was Marius; people never really treated him fairly compared to the other GSG9. Monika was never really bothered much by the boys, she was content since she seemed to be acting strange lately.. especially when she was around Ryad. He seemed so friendly to her, and he was also very protective of her whenever someone pulled a prank or did something to her.

With yet another sigh, Marius wiped the tears that rolled down his face, and sat up, looking out the window with nothing but sadness, doubt, and regret filling his heart.

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