Forbidden Love | Rainbow Six Siege

16. The Talk.

There's a lot of things you don't expect when you're confronting someone and being smart is one of them, especially if you're an anxious person. Was it positive to say that Bandit had underlying anxiety about this whole talk? Yeah, he did but the other part of him was masking everything he was feeling because he didn't want someone to turn around and start questioning him. It wasn't their place to know what he was feeling, when he was feeling it, and why he might be feeling it about. Bandit liked to remain a closed book. . .well, maybe a concrete wall until someone had a jack hammer strong enough to tear those walls down.

And Jäger tore those walls down.

But the fellow German operator didn't tear the concrete wall down with with a jack hammer, no, he tore the wall down as if it were made of breaks. Taking one off piece by piece, day by day, slowly exposing Bandit to the raw yet undesirable love that he hated seeing, hated touching, hated involving himself in. It was only because he didn't know how to handle it, handle the kindness in someone's heart. But Jäger seemed to do it with no flaws, no effort and every ounce of kindness that was inside of his body. It's like every fibre of Jäger's body was built to give others the love and kindness they deserved.

But did Bandit deserve it?

Bandit knew he deserved the harsh treatments and the rude remarks. He was a strong believer in manipulate or be manipulated and has never thought otherwise. No other woman or man had ever made him think twice about what his morals were or where his ethics laid along his spectrum. . .not until Jäger at least. Not until he felt his walls coming down brick by brick, stone by stone, and piece by piece. Those pieces that Bandit tried to frantically mold together and manage to fuck up his wall beyond repair and hurt the one deconstructing it as well.

Knock knock.

Every fibre in Bandit's body was praying and hoping that when the dorm room was opened that a fist didn't connect to his face. So when the door opened and his eyes shut tightly he realized a fist wasn't connecting to his face. Slowly he opened his right eye, then his left to relax his face.

"Dominic," the defender started. "What do you want this time?" This time? How many times did Bandit bother Jäger? Was this becoming repetition? Maybe it became annoying at the amount of times he pestered the other about forgiving him. Maybe this time he wouldn't be forgiven so easily, not after everything he's caused to all the people he's caused harm to. Would Jäger take such a sincere apology? Maybe it wouldn't be sincere enough for him. Though it wasn't easy to always muster up something from the bottom of your heart when you hardly ever apologized to other people. Was there anything to be sorry about when you didn't regret the thing you did?

But Bandit regretted it.

Big time.

"We need to talk."

"Not interested."

"Marius please."

That was new. Since when did Bandit ever plead or beg someone to talk to him? Apparently now because Bandit couldn't lose Jäger. He knew Doc was convinced that it could end rather quickly over the whole. . .thing. Bandit would, though, plead and beg for Jäger to understand him, to get his feelings.

"I do not need another apology. You aren't very good at keeping your word. You apologized the last time and I accepted it. Now look at where we are. Back at the beginning where you are here to apologize. Again."

Bandit's stance shifted because the words actually hurt. Never did Bandit think he would be turned down so fast with words, especially without even getting his own out, to express his feelings for the man. Did Jäger give up that fast? That easily on him, that he couldn't even spare him some time to speak? It seemed as so.

"Marius—" Bandit was determined and once he was determined he was going to set his mind on it. "No." He said as he pushed himself into Jäger's room. The other defender didn't seem to try and stop him. But why? Maybe Jäger wanted him to try and to push Bandit's buttons to see if he really gave a shit. If he didn't he could've simply walked away by now. It showed Marius that there was some determination, still, inside of Dominic's mind for whatever they had.

"I know what you're going to say—"

"What am I going to say, Dominic?" Why didn't Jäger call him Dom anymore? That stung.

"You don't care about my apology. You hate me. You want me to get clean, Marius—fuck. I know. Ok? I know what you are going to tell me and try and lecture me on. Let me talk to you. Tell you what I want — how I feel — because Mari, I've never gotten the chance to tell you the truth, to be honest, any of it."

"Why now? Why are you doing this now?"

"Because I ruined it all, and that's not what I wanted. Because-Because for the first time, Mari, I feel like I can tell the truth. And the truth is that I love you. And the bar-and the hot tub it was jealousy. I was fucking jealous that you did what you did with Jordan." Bandit let a breath go, his hand coming up to his hair where his hand ran through the short mess. "I have never wanted someone the way I have wanted you, Marius. You are all I have wanted for so long. Since Outbreak. Since New Mexico. Since before then, fuck, since long before then but I never said anything because I don't know how to say it. How do you tell someone you love them when Six does not let us be together? What do I say then? To her. When she finds out?"

Marius was quiet and so was Dominic after that rant. It didn't last long.

"She will not."

"Will not what?"

"Find out."

"Find out about what?" Marius sighed at Dominic's naïveté.

"Us; being together."

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Word count: 1k

I KNOW THIS IS SHORT, but i wanted to give content for the time being! I have more planned i reallllly hope that this slow and steady pace makes up for the chaos to come <3