Chapter 12

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"Bey are you ok?" Brianna asked peeking her head into Beyoncé's room. Brianna has been out of the hospital for 5 days and Beyoncé has been locked up in her room. She only left her room if Brianna needed help, and that wasn't often.

Brianna didn't understand why Beyoncé was so upset, and moping around. Jacob said it had something to do with Jay but Brianna still wasn't understanding, she just wanted her sister back.

"I'm fine," Beyoncé sniffed.

Brianna immediately knew Beyoncé was crying.

Brianna walked to Beyoncé's bed laying beside Beyoncé "You don't sound fine to me."

"It's nothing I can't handle Bri," Beyoncé said.

"It's ok to talk to me, I just wanna help."

"I just feel like the world is out to get me. I know I do a lot of wrong things but, even when I do right bad things happen. I just wanna be happy," Beyoncé cried. Being locked up in her room has made her reflect on everything that has happened in her life, and the bad outweighed the good.

"I miss him," Brianna said wiping the tear that slipped from her eye.

"Me too," Beyoncé said referring to her son Jj.

"Hopefully you find a new man and you guys will live happily ever after with lots of kids, and me," Brianna chuckled.

Beyoncé rolled her eyes, "I doubt it."

"Does this have something to do with Jay?"

"How d—"

"Jacob," Brianna said cutting her off,

"It's complicated," Beyoncé said.

"Don't beat yourself up about it, everything happens for a reason. Just pray and leave everything else to God. Things might not be good now but trust me, everything will work out in the end. Patience is a virtue," Brianna preached.

"I kill his people for a living, God hates me. That's why nothing good lasts for me."

"That's not true. God loves all his kids and I know for a fact he loves you, no matter what. Just ask for forgiveness, repent. Yeah mom died, foster care was hell, Jj was taken from you, and things are rocky between you and Jay but that was just a test, God has a plan for you."

"Since when did you turn into a church girl?"

"I've been going to church with your psychiatrist," Brianna smiled.

"Since when?"

"That's probably Jacob," Brianna said getting off Beyoncé's bed quickly to see who was at the door.

"This conversation is not over!" Beyoncé yelled getting up, heading to the door as well, "Who the fu— Jay?"

"Hello," Jacob said.

"Hi," Beyoncé smiled at him then looked back at Jay.

"Jacob and I will be in my room," Brianna said awkwardly.

"Keep the door open," Beyoncé said.

"Yeah ok."

"I just came here to drop Jacob off and to let you know that we're down with the Gucci situation," Jay said.

"Your answer is 3 days late," Beyoncé said with an attitude.

Beyoncé didn't want to admit it but she missed Jay, and he missed her. They were both stubborn so neither of them was going to actually admit it. Instead they were nonchalant.

"At least you got an answer, don't forget you need us," Jay said.

"You can leave now," Beyoncé said pointing to the door.

"Bye." he said before leaving.

Beyoncé sighed, locking her door.

After locking the door she went to Brianna's room "I'll be in my room, and keep this door open."

"Can I order food?" Brianna asked.

"You know my credit card information, and let me know immediately if you can't keep it down," Beyoncé said then headed to her room.

Beyoncé sat on the edge of her bed thinking about what Brianna preached to her.

Was it really that easy?

That night Beyoncé prayed, she had a long talk with God. She confessed her sins, she admitted her wrongdoing, she asked God for forgiveness. She also asked for better days, to be happy, to be a better person. She accepted the fact that her mother was dead, that she was raped, and that her son was killed. She was no longer going to dwell on the past but focus on the future.

After her talk with God she knew there were better days to come, she had faith.

~~~~
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