BLAKE | a. hotchner

14

A/n: This chapter is kind of short, sorry!

It was my turn to walk into the room that JJ had come out of just a few seconds earlier.  She gave me a small pat on my shoulder as a good luck before I opened the door and went into the room.

Strauss was sitting at a long table with two women on her right side and two men on her left.

"Blake, sit," she ordered.

I did as she said and sat down on a chair in front of her.

"We just have some questions that you need to answer regarding the case two days ago," Strauss said and looked down on her papers.

I nodded and waited for the first question.

"Is it true that Agent Hotchner separated himself from the group and confronted the unsub on his own?" Strauss asked.

"What? No!" I said with furrowed eyebrows.

"So he did not tell you to stay at bureau?" Strauss raised her eyebrows.

"He did but-"

"And he did not tell Dr Reid that they would split up?" She interrupted me.

"Yes, he did b-"

"And he did not wait for backup?" She cut me off, AGAIN.

"Listen to me!" I yelled. "That was his son!" 

"So don't you think it is a little unreasonable for him to work on that case?" Strauss asked calmly.

"I have no fucking clue! Okay?!" I helplessly put my arms out in the air. "I'm not an Agent, I'm not a fucking profiler! I'm a freaking consultant from jail and I have no idea what's reasonable to do in a case and what's not!" This was all bullshit.

"Calm down! And watch your language!" One of the guys on Strauss' left side spoke up.

"You may think that the loss today wasn't that big, but to him it was," I started.

"He has given his everything, every fiber of his being, to this job and he lost his wife and son in the process, twice, the second time permanently," I continued. "How much more will he be able to take before you realize that he lost his life to this job, but he still chooses to get up in the morning and keep on doing what he does. I'll tell you, I would've quit. I would never go back to this shithole if I were in his shoes," I stood up, angry.

"But how much longer before he loses the pieces of himself that makes him who he is?" I narrowed my eyes in Strauss'. "All you do is look for mistakes, you don't even care that he's grieving," I looked at all of them in disgust.

"Agent Hotchner did not follow protocol by confronting the unsub by himself!" Strauss said.

"I don't care about that damn protocol!" I yelled. "He's a human being for God's sake!"

I took a deep breath to calm myself. "And it's SSA Hotchner," I said before storming out of the room.

Dave looked up at me when I slammed the door behind me. I guess he was next.

"That bad, huh?" He asked with a sad smile.

"Those guys are assholes," I put my hands on my head in frustration and massaged my templed with my palms.

"Tell me about it," Dave muttered.

I sighed and sat down next to him. It wasn't until then I felt the pain growing in my stomach. I moaned from the pain.

"Have you heard anything from Aaron?" I asked.

"No, sorry kiddo," he put a hand om my shoulder as comfort. "How you doing?" He asked.

"Oh, I'm great," I said sarcastically.

Dave raised an eyebrow.

"It's just sore, but I'm more worried about Aaron," I sighed.

"He needs time."

"I know, I just-"

"Agent Rossi," Strauss showed her face in the doorway.

"Jesus, that woman needs to stop interrupting me!" I said annoyed.

Dave laughed before standing up.

"Wish me luck," he said.

"You're gonna need more than that."

He rolled his eyes before disappearing into the room.

I didn't see Aaron for a couple of months after the incident. Garcia spent Christmas and New Year's with me and Rose. Scott stopped by in his way to his parents and left a gift. And as the asshole I am, I forgot to get him something. We even had our first kiss, it wasn't anything special or very romantic. It was in the hallway outside our apartment and he had to go right after.

Morgan was with Savannah, JJ was with her family, Reid was in Vegas with his mom and Dave was apparently dating Strauss which was.. Yeah.

They all sent Christmas cards which I put up on the fridge. But nothing from Aaron, not that I expected anything I just wanted a sign that he at least was alive. I left a package of glow sticks outside his apartment but I wasn't sure if he ever got it.

We worked case after case, without hearing anything from or about Aaron. Not even an invitation to a funeral. I went on more dates with Scott and he tried to convince me not to worry about Aaron, of course it didn't work but I appreciated the effort.

***

"So, what do you want to do for your birthday?" Rose asked as I pushed her on her wheelchair through the park with Scott on my right side.

"I don't know, we don't have to do anything," I answered.

"Are you sure? It's only a few days away"

"Really? When's your birthday?" Scott asked.

"You don't have to kno-"

"It's April 16th," Rose answered.

"Damn it, Rose," I whispered.

"We have to celebrate!" Scott said excitedly.

"No," I said.

Scott just looked at me.

"NO!" I said flatly.

"Of course we do," Scott smiled.

"No, Scott! I don't want to remember that day," I stopped and faced him.

"Are you sure?" Scott furrowed his eyebrows.

"Yes, now please will you not tell anyone?"

"Okay, if that's what you want," he sighed and then smiled.

"Thank you," I gave him a quick peck on the lips before continuing walking.

"You guys are too cute," Rose said.

I smiled, we were, weren't we?