[ You Could Be Happy ] - [ Yuri!!! On Ice | OtaYuri ]

[3] - [ Blur ]

I ran as fast as I could, fueled by my anger and sadness. Even though Otabek already broke off our friendship, he went and made it worse. Hiding things behind my back and keeping the fact he's in love with someone a secret.

"...ugh!" I grunted, out if anger. I wanted to cry. It was too much, to loose so much in such a short time.

Ahead of me I could see Yakov and Lilia. "Ah, Yuri, there you are."

I didn't care to say anything back. I just ran through them, pushing them aside. "Yuri!" I hear Lilia call as I ran passed.

I make it home, burst through the door, and immediately head upstairs before my grandpa could say anything. I stop right at the door next to my room. This room...this was where Otabek was and would have been staying. I feel my eyes begin to water as I feel a hand on my shoulder. "Yura, are you alright?"

"дедушка..." I turn my head to face him. I wanted to say yes, but I knew that wasn't true. He must have noticed Otabek wasn't here as well. [ Grandpa... ]

"I'm assuming this has to do with Otabek, right? I heard you fight last night." He said, looking towards the room in front of us.

"Yeah...but I don't really want to talk about it right know." I replied looking down. "He...won't be back."

"Well, just know I'm here if you need me. You're my grandson, so I'm worried." He let go of my shoulder. "So, what about practice?"

"...Otabek was there."

He nodded. "I guess that can't be helped. Just rest for the day, alright? Don't hesitate to call for me if you need anything."

"I know, дедушка, thanks." I replied with a forced smile as he went back downstairs. It reassured me that he was there, but I still felt horrible.

~~~~

As I posted to Instagram, my phone started getting notifications like crazy. I know it seems bad to post something like that, but when that's how you really feel, it helps to get that off your chest. 

I look through to see a multitude of DMs from Otabek. I can't bear to talk to him, but...

I scrolled through his profile, but it only fills me with more anger, remembering what he said last night. I don't want to have anything to do with him at all.

~~~~

Are you Sure?

           Yes                 |                 No

~~~~

I wasn't sure if I really wanted to do this, but I really didn't want to see him again. I hit 'yes'. Now I had no reason to see him at all. He was officially blocked.

I set down my phone as I lied on my bed. It was odd to feel like this, to be so angry yet sad. But, to make things worse, I felt...

Lonely.

Why do I feel lonely? I shouldn't. I don't want to see him ever again, that's it. I guess it is odd to just not have him around, but...that shouldn't be a problem anymore, right? I officially blocked him, so there's no reason to be lonely.

Yeah, I blocked him out of my life entirely.

That's when I heard things downstairs. I could have Grandpa talking to someone, and I was getting a little worried. Soon enough, I heard someone running up the stairs. Shit.

I heard some panting at the door, then some vigorous knocking.

"Yuri...please." I hear. A voice I didn't want to hear.

I stand up, walk to the door. I hesitate for a second, but open it. There was Otabek, sweating, staring straight at me.

I didn't know what to do, so I shut the door on him just as he was reaching towards me. "Yuri! Are you okay? Don't just run off like that..."

"..." I just stood there behind the door, with nothing to say. What could I say?

"I'm sorry, Yuri..."

Hearing those words was hard, but it's not that easy to forgive. "Don't."

"But..."

"Just don't." My voice started to waver slightly. "I...don't care. I don't care at all anymore."

"...are you crying?"

"N-no! I'm... not crying." My voice starts to crack even more. "I'm n-not..."

"Yuri...we don't have to do this." He paused as I sniffled a bit. "We can be friends again."

I hesitated to respond. Do I want to? I...don't know. But not now. "No. I can't..."

I could feel his disappointment. I can't explain why I feel this way. Just the fact that he has someone else already is enough of a reason. I sniffle slightly. "Y-you're in love, right? I shouldn't interfere with that..."

"Wait, that's not-"

"You should just go, Otabek. You know I....I don't want to see you."

"Yuri..." I hear him call softly, as he gently opens the door, which surprised me.

He just stared at me, my face all red and wet with tears. "Otabek. Please, just...go."

"I don't want to-"

"Just leave me alone!" I shouted as I slammed the door on him. It's just like yesterday. Just like when he left me.

I heard him leave as I started crying even more. I don't know why, it just felt so wrong. He already has someone, so why do I feel so conflicted?

It's a waste to just wallow in my tears like this, but I don't know if I can do anything else. Especially skating, since he'll most likely be there.

Then I hear a small mew from below the bed. I look over to see Potya. "Ah, Potya..."

I scoop her up and lay her on the bed with me. I smile as she paws at my face. I laugh a little. "Heh...thank you, girl."

She meows in return as she lies down next to me. There's at least one thing that can cheer me up at least, so...why am I crying?

I really shouldn't be...Otabek will be happy with his love, won't he? I shouldn't feel this way about someone who used to be my closest friend. Just laying here crying myself to sleep won't do anything. It's just....I feel so shitty.

I decide that I shouldn't just waste the day, since it's still only around noon. If I'm going to get over this, wallowing over it won't help. I get up and go downstairs to try to relax and clear my head. "Yura, you okay?"

"...not really, дедушка."