Clear Blue (also on Amino somewhere...)

Catching On

Month 11, Day 5 

He was beginning to doubt that this crush was going to die down in four months. And today started so normally too- nothing out of the ordinary for once, and he even learned how to control his... mild 'jealousy' around Caramel.

He did have to admit though- it was getting hard to see the poor girl struggle in trying to talk to Viridian. Heck, Scarlet and Cider started a betting pool on when the girl would build up the courage to finally have a conversation with the caretaker. Cobalt learns later on that Caramel went to the same school as Viridian and briefly he wonders how much longer this girl has been crushing on them.

Amber even started an inside joke between him, Scarlet, and Cider. "When is she going to realize that she's either gay or straight?" It wasn't long before he started getting curious and asked himself the same question.

It was all fun trying to see this girl build up the courage to talk to the gender-queer, but then he wasn't at all that different from her, he realized. This newfound realization of his was all of a sudden hindering his ability to even speak to them. He already missed the fluid nature of his relationship with his coworker- the inside jokes, the occasional jab and embarrassing secret, and just talking with each other.

He dreaded the day that they'd bring it up, but unfortunately for him, that day came a lot faster than he'd hoped.

Cobalt could read it on their expression form the moment he entered the greenhouse- they were worried about him. "Cobalt, talk to me." He flinched at the bluntness of their voice, but he knew that he couldn't stay like that for long. "What's been going on with you?"

He needed to think of something fast- they were sharper than they seemed and that terrified him.

Cobalt couldn't say that he was going through 'that time of the month'- simply because boys didn't have that programmed into their biology. Well, maybe they have once upon a time, but he wasn't Charles Darwin so how would he know? He didn't have any allergies related to Viridian either, nor was he sick (but would being lovesick count?), so what should he be saying?

Anything but the truth, that's for sure- he didn't have one yet so why did that matter?

"Uh..." He swallowed a lump in his throat as he tried looking at them. "Nothing much, why do you ask?"

Viridian's eyes narrowed at him, and Cobalt internally kicks himself. "Cobalt, I'm not stupid- you've been avoiding me for a while now. What's with you?" He almost flinches again, but now it was because their voice sounded a bit broken as they said those words- like they were actually hurt that he was avoiding them. In the end, he was never able to look them in the eyes. How could he- he didn't even have a solid reason to avoid them yet!

He just said the next best thing instead. "I'm sorry, I've just had a couple of things on my mind lately..." A couple of things like being jealous of a girl of all people- this whole ordeal was just making him question his sexuality, but he can't tell them that. "I'd rather not talk about them, so I needed some uh... some space?"

The brunette just stared at him for a few moments, as if trying to read him. Cobalt could feel the pressure and intensity of their stare boring into his skin- geez, as if the feeling of their eyes trying to pierce through his soul wasn't already enough! Sometimes he wishes that his friend wasn't so perceptive. The day he found that out he already knew that part of theirs was going to screw him over one day, and he doesn't believe that he's lived to actually see that day happen.

After a few moments, they just sighed and dropped their gaze. Cobalt made sure to contain his own sigh of relief. "Whatever, just..." They pinched the bridge of their nose in exasperation. "You can talk to me if you need it..." And with that, they went out and closed the door behind him. Cobalt silently rejoiced as his held-back sigh left him. That was a nightmare.

But the tension wasn't gone when they left the room, and Cobalt made a mental note to try and cover up his situation. He didn't need to burden anyone with these messy feelings of his.