Texas Lucas

I Want To Remember You

Maya and Lucas walked away from Riley and Zay plopped down beside her with a smile.

"You're pretty great Riley."

Riley sighed. "I hate this."

Zay put his arm around her and she leaned her head on his shoulder. "I know, but sometimes life is about learning lessons, not about getting what you want."

Lucas and Maya stopped walking when they reached the door to the art room, it was the first empty classroom they could find to talk.

When they walked inside Maya sat in her seat and Lucas sat beside her. He took her hand and gave her a smile. She just looked down so he lifted her chin.

"Hi."

Maya sighed. "Hey."

"I think I'm not confused anymore. I understand now. You liked me, but you knew Riley liked me so you acted like you didn't like me. Right?" Maya bit her lip and nodded. "And I liked you, but I didn't think you liked me, but I knew Riley liked me so we went out then decided to just be friends because I didn't like her as much as she liked me, but I didn't really like her.. Because I like you." Lucas sighed. "I wish- I want to remember you, Maya. I want more than anything to remember you and.. us. I'm not confused anymore, but I just- I feel bad. My head hurts."

"Should I get the nurse?!" Maya panicked and stood, but he chuckled and pulled her back down beside him. "You okay?"

He smiled. "Yeah. I like that you care so much. Even if you want to pretend like you don't care."

Maya blushed a little.

"My head just hurts when I think about you, like a memory is trying to surface, but it can't. If that makes any sense at all."

Maya thought for a moment. "I think I might know which memory is trying to break free." She stood, but before he could pull her back down she grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and pulled him up. She looked up into his eyes and he looked down into hers. "You questioning my leadership Hop-a-long?"

He chuckled. "Those names you call me must be killing my street cred." She smiled brightly. "Uh-"

"Well what would you like me to call you?" She said in a flirty way giving him a little mocking pout.

He smiled. "I'd rather be called something like Maddog." He said then he winced at the headache.

"You don't seem like a Maddog to me." Maya mocked him again.

Lucas shook it off and kept staring into her eyes. "What do I seem like to you?" He asked.

Maya smiled. "You know that lamb that Mary had?"

"I don't like the way this is going."

Instead of pushing him away like Maya did that day she pulled him closer surprising him. "What way do you want this go, Lucas?" She asked him seriously, she was breathing heavily in his face.

Lucas captured her lips with his.

Maya kissed back, her grip on his shirt loosened and she wrapped her arms around him. He put his hands on her petite waist. They stood there for awhile and kissed then he pulled away suddenly.

"I should have kissed you then."

Maya's eyes lit up. "Do you- Do you remember that day?"

"Not really." Maya frowned. "But I remember that moment." She stared at him. "I should have kissed you. I wanted to when you were that close, but I didn't. I think there were a lot of people around and I just- I chickened out, I guess." Lucas explained.

Maya sighed. "Yeah and I, um, I pushed you away." She frowned. "I always pushed you away."

Lucas gave her a small smile and took her hand in his. "Riley?"

Maya shook her head. "Not just Riley. Me. I figured a guy like you would never like a girl like me."

Lucas frowned in confusion. "Why wouldn't I? You're great."

Maya sighed. "I'm broken."

Lucas wiped away the tear she didn't know she let out. "So am I."

Maya scoffed. "No, you're not. You're a good guy. You're Mr. Perfect. I'm just broken."

Lucas leaned down and kissed her forehead. "I don't feel any cracks or missing pieces.. Well maybe one missing piece, but I'm here now." He smiled. "Maya, I'm broken too, believe me. I don't remember how I am now with you guys, but before, I was a mess, you can ask Zay. I didn't just get into fights because of his big mouth. It was just easier to be mad at him than at myself. Every time I had a problem I thought I could solve it with my fists. Every time my friends had a problem I thought I could solve it with my fists. My first reaction is always anger and violence. I'm broken."

Maya chuckled. "I'm the same way, more sarcasm and violence though. Riley helps with that."

Lucas nodded. "She must've helped me too because everyone seems to think I'm better than I am. Maybe I got better, but I can't remember it." He frowned.

"I don't know how much help Riley could've been. We didn't even know about any of that until 8th grade when Zay came. You were just this wholesome Texas boy, the moral compass."

Lucas looked confused again. "I never tried to fight anyone?"

Maya sighed. "Well, there was this time when one of your baseball friends was bullying Farkle. I wanted to find the bully and fight him, but you stopped me. You literally picked me up so I wouldn't leave the room, then when we found out he was your teammate you tried to fight him and I stopped you, but you said-"

"I thought that was what you wanted, Maya. I thought you wanted to find him and make him pay."

"I did, but when I saw you I didn't want you to get in trouble. I thought of you like Riley, all nice and innocent, then you were about to punch him so I jumped on your back to stop you."

"Thank you. I guess Zay was right, Riley didn't change me as much as you did. I wish I could remember more. Will you help me? Tell me more stories, just about you and me? I want to just focus on remembering you."

Maya smiled. "I can't argue with that. I want you to remember."

"I want to remember you."