"Let's take a break"
My heart stung and tears were already falling from my eyes, one after another. My world crashed as those words were slipping out of his mouth. I couldn't move or say anything. I froze at my spot and people were looking at us weirdly, like if they saw a unicorn or something. Finally, I was able to say something, stuttering.
"Y-you want to b-break up?"
"No! That's not what I mean. I just want us to take a little bit of distance for some time, like, a month?"
"So, we're still together?"
"Yea."
"Oh, okay then. I respect your decision."
And I quickly ran out of the mall and went home. I cried and cried and cried until I fell asleep, holding the lion stuffed toy that Taehyung got me more than a year ago, as my birthday present.
~~~~~
A WEEK LATER
It's been a week. I've been depressed. A lot of things happened that cured my depression. Soohyun, my best friend, is suffering from lung cancer, stage 1 and went to America to pass an operation. I cried a lot because of that. My only loyal friend left me, I am so worried about her. And it's been a week since Taehyung and I are taking a 'break' but we still are together. I haven't talked to him or any of the bangtan members since then. All of them-except Taehyung- called me many times, but i kept rejecting their calls, knowing that if I talk to one of them, i would start crying like a baby like I do every night.
The next morning, I woke up and did my morning routine. I noticed my puffy eyes so I washed my face. I went downstairs and I was greeted by my mom.
"Hello dear, how was your night?"
"Good morning mom" i gave her a kiss on her cheek, avoiding her question. "I'll be going to school now, see ya"
"See you"
I just stepped out of the house, and I was already sweating. These days I kept wearing long sleeves. Yes, I was cutting myself and I didn't want anybody to know. When I see the red blood coming out of my arms, all my worries would fly away, I would feel better. But when the cuts close, loneliness and madness would take control of my body.
I arrived at school and as usual, one of the BTS members tried to talk to me, but I would always ignore them. I went to my locker to get my history books and then headed to class. I took my seat-the one at the very back near the window that is isolated from everyone- and waited for class to start. There was a few people already in the class who were staring at me with a pitiful look, because of course Yerin had to tell them that Taehyung and I are in sort of a break or whatever. I used to sit next to Taehyung, but Yerin asked the teacher to change place with me, and she agreed. I can't believe it. We were the most popular couple of school and now we are slowly drifting apart. Soon, the teacher came and announced us that there will be a new student in our class. "Come in" she said to the tall guy that was outside the door. Jackson came in, smiling like an idiot. I wanted to smile because I finally had a friend, but I kept my blank face.
"Hello, I am Jackson and I hope that we will be friends, please take care of me!!. Oh? Y/N? Is that you?"
Great. How embarrassing.
"I guess that you know miss Han, go take a seat next to her." The teacher, mrs Lee, said.
Jackson obeyed the teacher and sat next to me. I gave him a death glare before focusing on the lesson and taking notes on my copybook.
A couple of classes went by, pretty boring as usual, and it was now lunch time. Like every lunch, I didn't eat and went to the rooftop instead. I climbed the abandoned staircase and once at the top of it, I opened the door and walked in. The rooftop is a peaceful place, rumours says that someone committed suicide on the rooftop so no one dares to come here. I sat at the corner of the room , pulled out my sleeves and took my scissors from my bag. I looked at the cuts of my arm. 'How pathetic' I thought. I pressed the scissors against my skin, and when I was about to cut my arm,
"WHAT THE HELL??!!"
"W-what are you doing h-here?" I stuttered.
