Almost A Teen

I'm so mad that I could stub my toe.

Dear Diaryza,

Hope you like your new name bestie! Okay I'm sorry I take that back. Wait.
Hope you like your new name second bestie! Sorry but I promised Lindon that me and her are besties for life. Even though I told her that I didn't like her this morning but that isn't my fault.
Right listen. Last month she got a cat and she called her cat Daisy. I specifically told her cats don't like sharing their name, but she still did it anyway! Who goes against MY advice?

Today I walked into her house and her cat SCRATCHED MY FACE! I told Lindon that it's her fault because her cat knows we share a name and it's her fault because SHE named the stupid thing.

Remind me to never get a cat.

Ever.

Now my face hurts and I'm not in a very good mood. What didn't help is the fact my brother then decided he would laugh at me ALL day! It's okay though. He can't laugh anymore. I hit him in the face and I got sent to my room. I said to my mum "BUT MUM HE LAUGHED AT MY FACE AND I WANTED HIM TO KNOW HOW IT FEELS" but you know, she's all for morals so here I am. Sitting in my bed talking to you.

I don't even know if Lindon forgives me for telling her I don't like her and then walking out the door. I think I heard her chasing her cat down the road afterwards, so I think I accidentally let him out. Lindon said something about he's not old enough yet or some other lie. That's what cats are supposed to do, right? In the wild, they can't sit in a house until their feet reach a certain shoe size.

I don't even know why I'm thinking about it. Everyone want's to be my friend. Except Jason – who reminder – thinks I'm only KINDA CUTE. NOT COMPLETELY CUTE. KINDA!

I'm so mad that I could stand up and stub my toe. On purpose.

I think I've reached my mid-life crisis! I'm going crazy! No wonder why Britney Spears shaved her head. I bet someone called her KINDA CUTE.

Maybe I should shave my head. I think I could rock it.

Hmm.

~~~

OH CHEESEBALLS

I messed up. MY BROTHER MESSED UP.

I went to shave my head, so I went into the bathroom and got my dad's beard thingy. I held it to my head and my brother came out from behind THE STUPID SHOWER CURTAIN! What was that idiot doing there anyway?! Weirdo.

ANYWAY. HE MADE ME JUMP AND NOW I ONLY HAVE ONE EYEBROW!

So now, I have a head full of hair and one eyebrow.

Yep, this is what a midlife crisis feels like.