21 Years

Chapter 10

After a day of recovery, Sinbad and Judal were preparing to leave for Parthevia. Judal sighed deeply, then jumped slightly when he felt arms wrap around his waist. "You okay?"

"Yeah, just... anticipating this trip."

"Yeah... a lot of things happened to you in Parthevia... to both of us." Judal nodded and leaned into Sinbad's embrace. "Wait are we going to visit the village you grew up in? Actually, scratch that, we're going."

"I don't get a say in this?" Sinbad asked. "Nope because tragic shit happened to us both in that village so we're going!"

"Dear God, no..."

"Dear God, yes! We're going to cry and suffer then smile and cry some more because that's all I'm good at doing anyways~! Ahahaha! Suffering in silence." Judal said in a happy tone.  "You're weird, but I love you for it."

"Damn right you do and I love you too ~," Judal said as he kissed Sinbad's chin. Sinbad chuckled then he let go of his lover. "Shall we go?"

"Yeah..." Judal said then looked around as he heard their names being called. The eight generals including the primary trio were running up to them. "Hey, lovebirds! We wanted to see you off!" Sinbad smiled and nodded. "Thank you. I hope you all will be alright with watching over Sindria while we're gone."

"Hopefully nobody will go nuts or something," Judal added.

"Relax! We've got this! You two just go and enjoy yourselves!" Sharrkan said.

"Yeah, you two deserve it!" Yamuraiha said. The couple looked at one another for a moment before the magi smiled and nodded. "Welp, you heard them, Sinbad, Let's go. This is going to be a long...long two months."

The king and queen boarded the ship and waved to everyone as the ship left the dock. Judal sighed as he sat down on a bench and thought about what was to come within these two months. He couldn't believe that the two of them were actually going to be along for two whole months. Judal watched his hair blow from the nice warm sea breeze. "I wonder if I should start braiding this again...?" He said as he pulled out his wand and slowly started to braid it only to stop midway as images of his old self started to form in his mind. It was as if his old self from when he still lived in Kou were staring down at him with a wicked smile on his face. This threw him into a panic. "Don't look at me... You're not me... not anymore... I'm better... I'm getting better. I'm not sad or crazy... Please don't look at me... not like that... I'll never go back to my old ways... I'm happy like this. I'm useful..."

"So you think." The image spoke making the magi gasp. "You're useful when it comes to venting frustration. That's all you've ever been good for. Don't you see? Gyokuen wanted sex from you, Al-thamen beat you, Dalir beat you and raped you, Sinbad talks and maybe ask for sex. You're just there for people to take out their frustration on you. Do you really think that you're being useful? You're just existing." The image said. His breathing picked up as he was thrown into a panic. He heard it all before. This wasn't the first time that this had happened and at the moment he didn't want to hear it again either. Judal quickly pushed his fingers through the knots and roughly pulled his fingers through his hair undoing his braid and with that the image of his former self faded into nothingness. "B-Bad... idea..." He said as tears started to stream down his face. Sinbad had been talking to one of the ship's crew members when he noticed Judal's sudden rough movement. "Judal...?" The king called out but only became worried when his lover didn't respond.

"Judal?" He tried again as he walked over to his lover. A whine escaped Judal's lips and Sinbad was immediate to his side. "Hey, what happened... ?" He asked, his voice full of worry. Judal shook his head and whispered "nothing..." Sinbad used his thumb to wipe the tears off of his lover's rosy tear-stained cheeks. "It can't be nothing if it has you crying like this..."

"It's nothing okay?? I just.. I just thought about something that I shouldn't have and I just got a little scared is all..."

"Talk to me." Judal quickly looked up at Sinbad with a shocked yet confused look on his face. "Huh? B-But I am--"

"Tell me what you're afraid of... what scared you...?" 

"I-I can't..."

"Why not?"

"Because... It's something so trivial you'll probably get mad at me."

"Judal I highly doubt that you of all people would cry over something trivial. I know you... Now tell me what's wrong... Are you nervous about going back to Parthevia?"

"Well... I am, but... I'm just... I'm questioning my worth."

"Your...worth?"

"Yes! Sinbad... am I only good for helping people take out their frustration.?" Have I been useless this whole time...? Have I helped you at all with anything when it comes to Sindria or anything else?" Sinbad sat there in shock for a moment before gently grabbing a hold of Judal's hand. "How long have you been feeling this way?"

"forever..."

"Sweetheart you're a great help. Especially with decision-making. I'm pretty sure that if you weren't here I probably would have done something that I'd regret. Like... The whole plan to end wars. You've helped me tighten my bond with my friends, we're friends with the new king of Parthevia and Kou because of you, and let's not forget to mention the crap ton of paperwork that I had to do, but you did it for me while I was out. I'm very grateful to have you here with me. You are such a big help and don't let anyone tell you otherwise, not even yourself, okay?" Judal slowly nodded and received a small kiss to his cheek. 

The two lovers had stayed together and enjoyed each others company as they watched the waves crash against the boat until nightfall. The two walked into their cabin since it got too dark outside and they could not see the ocean water.  Sinbad laid on his hammock and before Judal could even think to sit on his own Sinbad pulled the magi on to his lap. "I hope you weren't thinking that you would actually get a night away from me Judal~!"

"O-O course not!"

"You were totally thinking it..."

"I was not!!!"

"Okay, I believe you."

"Sinbad, was that sarcasm? I swear if it was I will try everything within my power to make sure that you don't leave this room without stubbing your toe on something."

"Sweet mother of Theresa please don't." Judal let out a small laugh before leaning against Sinbad. All of today's activities were finally starting to catch up with him. Sinbad smiled lovingly and kissed the top of Judal's head before laying down to get more comfortable. He rested his head on a pillow while Judal had his head on Sinbad's chest and soft snores could soon be heard coming from him. Sinbad gently rubbed his lovers back as he thought about the days to come until eventually, he let sleep overcome him. 

AN: Well, this chapter was short, but it seemed like a pretty good place to stop. Plus I'm pretty busy this month since I just celebrated my birthday, then I'm going to an anime convention this weekend, then I'll be on vacation for a week. So yeah, I hope you liked this chapter!