mess - bang chan

02

"torri, wake up! wake up, you idiot!" jihyun yelled at me as she shaked me to make me open my eyes.

"the fuck you want?" i yelled back at her as i rubbed my eyes.

"thank god you're awake." she sighed, letting go of my arms and rolling her eyes. "what happened to you last night?"

"i don't know, i don't remember." i said, looking down.

"you can't hide anything from me, tor. we've been friends since we were born. basically, we're like sisters. even if you'll lie to me right now, you know that i'll find it out later so it's better if you tell it to me right now."

i signed in defeat. "fine, he broke up with me."

jihyun was about to drink her glass of water but she stopped moving when she heard what i said. she sighed and placed the glass down before sitting down beside me on the bed.

she just gave me a hug, a big warm hug, the kind of hug that i needed. before i knew it, i was already crying on her chest, but she didn't care if her shirt was already soaked in tears.

she slowly and softly patted my head and combed my hair using her fingers and she whispered comforting words and phrases into my ears.

jihyun was like my sister. no, she is my sister. not by blood, but by heart.

"i'm so messed up, i'm such a mess." i told myself as i burried my face into the palm of my hands.

"no, no. sweetie, you aren't. don't say that." jihyun said as she patted my back softly. "do you want a drink?"

i slowly nodded as i lifted my head up and wiped my tears away. she stood up and took the glass of water then gave it to me. i took the glass from her and slowly gulped it.

i gave her back the glass of water and took a deep breath. i closed my eyes and continued to inhale and exhale until my breathing was normal again.

"what do you want for lunch?" jihyun asked me as she went back in the room with a new shirt.

"i don't know, i don't feel like eating-"

"no, you need to eat."

"but i don't-"

"you'll eat, whether you like to or not. change your clothes we'll go out." she told me before she closed the door.

i sighed as i got off the bed. jihyun was older than me anyway so i had to follow her. she was the only family i had and i can't afford to lose her.

after changing into new clothes, i ran downstairs. "i'm ready!" i yelled.

"okay, let's go." jihyun was standing by the door, holding the doorknob, very ready to twist it open.

"where are we going anyway?" i asked with curiosity like a little kid.

"to the coffee shop where i work in obviously."

"oh, yes, right."

she nodded and finally twisted the doorknob open. she got out first and i followed before closing and locking the door.

ㅡ ㅡ ㅡ

"jihyun! thank goodness you're finally here. oh, and hello there, torri." hansoo, jihyun's co-worker, greeted us as we entered the coffee shop.

"sorry about being two minutes late." jihyun apologized to hansoo as she wore her apron.

"why were you late anyway?" hansoo asked jihyun as she crossed her arms.

the two had a little argument and it was a bit annoying to hear. i just stared outside the window and watched the people passed by, not realizing i was zoning out.

i was still not through about last night. why? why did he have to leave me? was there something wrong i did? or was he just tired of me? or am i not good enough?

tears were very close to rolling out of my eyes as memories of me and him replayed on my mind, but then i had to return to reality.

"torri?" hansoo called my name.

i shook my head and blinked fastly a few times. "w-what?"

"are you okay?" they both asked.

i smile and nodded. "yeah, sorry about zoning out."

"here's your breakfast. make sure to finish them." jihyun told me as she placed a plate of pancakes with maple syrup and a glass of caramel cappuccino in front of me.

i smiled at the beautiful and tasty meal in front of me. this was just the kind of meal that i needed to start my day, to take my mind off that bastard.

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the whole i am who album
is a bop, is perfection and
my pace deserves a win