Chasing Stars

G r i e f a n d a p l a n

Austin sunk down on his knees, with his head in his hands.

"I never knew she had these desires. These wishes that she never got a chance to fulfill. I never even wondered whether she got everything she wanted in life. What kind of a son am I?" He asked himself hoarsely.

"A good one" I said.

I crouched down next to him and put a tentative hand on his back. "Austin, it was a bucket list. Lots of people have those. You never know, maybe she did do everything already without you knowing it. And even if she didn't, she had lots of good things in her life. She had you didn't she?"

"It's not the same" Austin groaned. " She deserved a life with no regrets, but she didn't get one. But she deserved it. She deserved it more than anything anyone can ever deserve."

I straightened up and brushed my hands off on my jeans. I needed to go, to let Austin be alone for a while.

I took out a scrap of paper and a pen from my side bag, and scribbled my number on it, and gently placed it in Austin's hand.

    "Call me if you need to Austin"

I guided myself through the clutter of boxes and carefully swung myself down the ladder.

    As I walked home, I thought about the grief of realizing that you're loved one hadn't had the chance to make the most out of his or her life. I felt a surge of symapthy in my chest for Austin. 

    I reached my house and walked through the front porch.

   "I'm home!" I announced.

     My voice echoed across the walls and I remembered that Michelle had dance class today.

  I had the house to myself.

     In a low mood, I walked up the stairs, and fell onto my bed.

    I heard a buzz from my cellphone as it vibrated on my desk.

    I grimaced. It was probably my mom, asking what I wanted for dinner.

    I sighed and reached for my phone, grabbing it before it fell.

   It was a text from Austin, and I smiled despite myself.

    Call me. Emergency.

         I furrowed my eyebrows and dialed his number, wondering what the fire was.

   He picked up on the second ring.  

     "Hello?" I asked uncertainly.

           "I have a plan"

        To my great surprise, his voice was bright and sunny, showing no sign of tears whatsoever.

     "Okay?"

            "Well, after you left, I had an epiphany. Since my mom couldn't complete the bucket list, I'll do it for her! I aslo thought that this could be our project instead of that stupid ancestry thing, so I emailed Mr.Foster and he said we could do it, but only if we right an essay at the end."

    I was silent for a second, processing his words.

   "Tess, you there?"

       "Yeah. Yeah I'm here" I said clutching my phone.

    "So isn't a brilliant idea?" Austin asked enthusiastically.

   I laughed at his excited tone.

       "Oh yes, its an amazing idea although it does have its flaws." I replied.

     "There are no flaws at all Tess."

           "Read the list out for me Austin" I ordered.

    I heard a rustle of paper as he picked up the note.

    "Things to do before I die" Austin read. "One. Ride a rollercoaster. Two. Swim in the ocean. Three. Participate in a triathlon. Four. Travel to Australia. Five." his voice faltered for a second, but then picked up again, stronger than ever.

    "Five. Raise a family"

          I sighed. I didn't want to dampen his spirits, but an impossibility couldn't be overlooked.

     "Austin, those are all wonderful things to do and all, but... travel to Australia? How exactly are we going to fund that?"

     "That's the brilliant part!" Austin laughed, " Its brilliant! Its perfect timing. My dad has to go on a business trip to Sydney in two months. He already booked tickets for me and for him."

     I looked at the ceiling exasperated.

        "Yeah okay. So you can go do the trip and the triathlon then. I'll just sit at home and ride a rollercoaster. What a wonderful essay that will produce." I said sarcastically.

    Austin groaned through the phone. "Tone down that hostility remember? I have a plan for that too. Listen Tess, when I said my dad is a businessman, well I may have undermined it a little. He actually owns a company."

     "Well that's good for you" I said.

           "No you don't get it. He can buy you a ticket. It won't make a difference to him at all."

       I laughed. Loudly.

            "Austin. Even if your dad was that good of a person, have you met my mother? She would never agree to this" I exclaimed.

     "You have two months to convince her. I have to go. Meet me at Central Park tomorrow at noon"

     He hung up, leaving me to stare unbelievably at my phone.