Chasing Stars

T i c k e t s. L e t t e r s

It happened on the fifth day back from

spring break, three days after the incident with Nate.

I opened the mailbox like I usually do. I took out the mail and sorted them out like I always do.

It was sitting there in the exact middle of the small pile of papers. A simple white envelope, with no return address. When I picked it up, my pulse quickened, my breath came short. Somehow I knew it was from him. I could feel him, the light brush of his fingers lacing through mine. I could smell his vanilla scent, I could see his gleaming eyes.

With trembling fingers I tore the delicate seal and took out three long pieces of papers.

Tickets.

They were tickets.

Heart thudding, I felt the envelope again, searching for answers, and my fingertips met another piece of paper.

I pulled it out and unfolded it. It was a letter.

Tears pricked the corners of my eyes. He had written a letter. Finally. After a year of no word, no communication, he had written.

I scanned the paper hungrily, eating up his familiar words.

Tessy Bear,

I have tried for endless hours to get you out of my head. I tell myself that you are part of a life that I no longer have. Nothing but a memory. Tess I left because I needed to do something with my life. Fighting with your mother was not it. I tell myself that everything has a cost, nothing comes without a price. But Tess, this price isn't something I am not willing to pay.

I know I seem despicable. Its just who I am. The memories you have of me never showed this side of me.

No matter how bad I am though, I need to see you. I love you honey, I always will. And no amount of time can fix that. It was a mistake on my part to marry your mother, to have you and your sister, but the choice has already been made.

You gave me a light to my dark life Tess. I need my light back.

Come to Sydney. Bring Michelle and your mother, they could use a vacation.

When you arrive, I will meet up with you on the third day at the pier at noon. I promise Ill be there.

I know you are having doubts on whether you want to see me, but I am your father, you cannot hate me forever.

Do not tell your mother that the tickets were from me. Tell her they were rewards from the airline company. She will believe it, we talked about booking tickets for you a year ago, and she thought I did.

Honey, please forgive me for leaving. I needed to get away. Handling a family was just not something I had the ability to do.

I love you Tess. Always have. Always will.

Love Dad.

I closed my eyes, and sat down heavily on a chair. I read the letter over again, wishing the words would change.

He was right. I did think him despicable. He called us a mistake. His love for us was something he could not fix. I was a drug for him. Something to fulfill his desires. His last shred of humanity.

I hugged the letter to my chest. We would go of course. Mom deserved a decent vacation. Michelle would love Australia.

I would not meed Dad though. My view on him had changed. He was not my safeguard anymore. He was something I needed to push away.

I tucked the letter into the pocket of my jacket and studied the tickets.

"Mom!" I yelled, pushing back tears. "Mom there's something you need to see!"

She walked in carrying a box of vegetables from the garden. She set it down, and brushed her hands in her jeans, getting the dirt out. "What is it?"

"Mom, we're going to Australia"

And then, absurdly, I grinned.

Australia. It looked like Austin's wish was coming true after all.