Seeking Souls

4: In Control

Four Years Ago

“Can you please explain to me what in the hell we are doing here Desmond?” Kara just about growled at me as I had my hands over her eyes, pushing her down the street to an undisclosed location. It was her birthday, and I wanted to show her my surprise for her.

       “Just shut it, it’s a surprise so let it be a surprise.” I whispered to her as I steered her towards my house, my parents weren’t home and to confuse my friend, I took her around the block a few times. I opened my front door and shoved her inside, closing the door gently behind me. “Keep them closed Kara.” She nodded to my remark as I gently nudged her into the living room of my home. “Okay, open them.” She opened her eyes and instantly laughed at what was in front of her. A Nintendo 64 with just about all of my Mario games and two controllers, next to that was a tasty cake with a candle sticking into it, along with two bags of chips. “Happy Birthday, Kara.”

       Kara looked over at me and punched me in the arm. I flinched and rubbed the spot gently. “You’re the best Des.” I smiled and bent over to get the controllers off of the floor. I handed it to her and she glared at me. “Don’t go easy on me just because it’s my birthday okay?”

Present Day

       I sat in the living room of my house, on the floor in front of the tv as I played a nice game of Super Smash Bros. The memories of Kara’s birthday surprise circling through my brain. I had taken an extra day off to just clear my head. No repercussions had come from punching that guy in the face, so I was pretty damn happy about that. I had to keep myself in control of my own mind and avoid all unnecessary stress. Was it normal for someone to go through this kind of thing? My best friend had died right before my eyes, I couldn’t save her. Perhaps if I had gotten in the water faster, or if I convinced her that it was a bad idea to go out onto a frozen lake. I found myself dead in the game and my hands shaking violently, tears falling from my face to my hands. This isn’t a good way to stay in control of my life.

       There was a knock on my door just then, and I had to pull myself together so I could answer it. I got up to my feet and walked over to the door, taking a slow breath and opening it up. “Hey Desmond!” It was Madison, to be honest; she was just about the last person I wanted to see. Yeah she seemed nice, but there was just something off about her, something I couldn’t put my finger on. “I brought you your homework for the day.”

       “How do you know where I live?” I whispered, it had just occurred to me that I had only had one conversation with this girl yesterday and in no way shape or form did I disclose my address to her. She handed me a few papers and smiled at me.

       “I asked the office, duh.” She pushed her way inside of my house and looked around. This girl isn’t too right in the head. “Nice house you got here.” Wait, I thought, did I invite her in? I don’t think I did. She turned around to face me just then, her expression more serious. “So how are you feeling today?”

       I shrugged, walking past her and picking up the controller. “I’m alright; I just needed another day to get my head on straight is all.” Truth was I wasn’t alright, and I was slowly moving towards a horrible break down in which I might just punch a hole in a wall, or the nearest person. Just go away, I thought, leave me be so I can take my anger out on this game and not on you.

       “Did you and Kara play this game a lot?” I cringed when she said that, my mind telling me to calm down, but my muscles telling me to throw the controller at her head. “I hope you didn’t go easy on her whenever it was her birthday.”

       I snapped at her, my anger getting the best of me. “Get out of my house.” Madison looked almost shocked to hear me say that. “I don’t know what your deal is, but you need to leave me alone. Stop bringing up Kara; just leave her alone to fucking rest.”

       “She’s not resting.” I was ready to finally scream and kick her out of my house. I stood up, glaring at her. “I can see her Desmond.” I stopped, my heart skipping a beat. “I can see her spirit.”