Bullies|| Noah schnapp x reader

Part 32

Your pov

"Are you seriously not gonna try to make up with Noah?" Sadie asked, that ought to be the dumbest question ever. I stopped what I was doing and looked at her

"Listen, I already said no! No. N o. Noooooo" I said and turned back to writing in my journal, or doodling

"But I thought you loved him" she finally said, I felt a sting in my heart and I looked at her again

"I don't love him! It was just a dumb little crush.... and even if I did, that feelings long gone" I wish I wasn't lying

"Fine fine, let's go get some food" Sadie suggested seeing the look on my face

I wasn't in the mood for food but Sadie started naming my favorite and I just had to give in

-Once the food arrived-

I looked over at my little table next to my bed and saw the book, the one Noah gave me.. I haven't been able to read it yet, I'll read it later on today

"Come on let's watch a movie" Sadie said "how about a comedic movie" she suggested taking a bite of her food

"Yeah" I nod and look away from the book, I just need to forget about him. As much as it might hurt, I need to forget about him. I felt a tug at my heart but I ignored it

We started watching a movie, it was pretty funny but I just wanted to sleep, I was so unmotivated by everything. Having my eyes open and trying to take the emotions out of it was hard work man. Sleeping is all I wanna do now, like I said I'm unmotivated by everything, if I stand up and go around I just see things that make me depressed

Even on movies, everyone seems to be so much prettier than me. As if everyone got sprayed with something that made them beautiful except me. The only ones keeping me on my feet are my friends, Sadie Leo and ash... the only ones I feel comfortable around with now

But I feel like even they get tired of me. Sleeping is my only escape from all that, the closest thing I have to death.

I snapped out of my thoughts when I heard a knock on my door, I looked at Sadie and stood up to check the hole thing. My eyes widened when I saw Noah standing there

I turned around and had a panicky look on my face. I ran to Sadie and starting jumping not a happy or big jump

"Sadie it's Noah. Please make him leave" I whispered scrambling around looking for somewhere to hide

"What? Noah, what's he doing here" she whispered back

"Uh I don't know, do you think I have telepathy or something" I said sarcastically

"Well what do I do?" She asked looking confused

"Maybe he'll think we're not here if we're quiet" I whispered back

He knocked again "I know you're in there y/n please open up" I heard him say

I looked at Sadie and she looked at me. "Go hide, I'll tell him something" she whispered, I went to hide inside my closet, I put a cover over myself and hid under clothes. I heard Sadie open the door

They started talking and I had to put full consideration into making out what they were saying

"Is y/n here?" Noah asked, why does he care?

"Why do you care?" Whoosh.

"Because, I just wanna tell her something" he said

"Like what? That you're sorry." I held back a WHEEZE

"Is she here or not?" Noah asked again after a while

"No." Sadie answered quickly

"Then why are you in her room?" He asked

"Because I'm watching a movie.." she said back

"But why can't you do that in your own room?"

"Because Noah, millie is there.. and.. well" Sadie said

"Then where's y/n?" I heard him ask.. he needs to go

"She went for a walk" Sadie lied to him

"Can you please tell her t- never mind thanks anyways" he said sadly and I heard him leave, I waited a little more minutes and finally got out sweating a water fall

I sighed and I let myself fall on my bed

"You need some x songs, hold up" Sadie said and started playing 'hope' I smiled slightly but stayed still.. I started feeling all my emotions and I felt sad as hell but it was somewhat making me feel better

Sadie turned down the song only a little and started talking to me

I didn't end up listening because I knocked out, which is probably a good thing because I didn't wanna talk about Noah.

Guys.. I .. am .. not.. okay

School sUCKS. Here's an update for you beautiful mofos

Also I just noticed my chapters are so depressing I'm sorry, I'll try to make them less depressing (if that's even possible)