Chapter 25 FUCK THE PAIN AWAY!!

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Gemma pulled into the TM parking lot
I walked in the clubhouse all the guy’s stopped what they we're doing looking at me with pained expressions on their faces I knew they we’re hurting for me Chibs and Tig smiled at me I half smiled back Alyssa stood up from the couch she ran towards me and hugged me tightly we both started crying she felt my pain she understood what i was going through she was the only real person that udnerstood me that i had right now we walked back to my room I walked in the bathroom and cleaned up i looked at myself in the mirror i had dark rings under my eye's i looked like complete shit! And i left like complete shit! I noticed i started to get tiny little stretch marks i rubbed my hands over my stomach this baby boy was the only part of G i had left now and i was going to do everything i could to keep him safe.

I got in bed holding my stomach I was so excited i was going to have a little boy just like G wanted I started playing around with names I had some good one’s picked out

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I got in bed holding my stomach I was so excited i was going to have a little boy just like G wanted I started playing around with names I had some good one’s picked out. After i got back home i spent what felt like days in my room i
didn't want to leave their was nothing
left for me out there he was gone 6 feet under and he was never coming back. Their was a light knock on the bedroom door come in! Alyssa walked in Hey? Hi she sat down next to me and took my hand you need to go see G you need to go to the Cemetery everyone was looking for you today Eight was so hurt that you didn't come you should of seen his face I looked at her You wanted me to go there and relive what happened that night all over again? No i didn't mean it like that i..She put her hand up I don't wanna hear it. I stood up and grabbed my hoodie and threw it over my shoulders and zipped it about half way i turned to her i hate to admit it but Your right I do need to go I put my hands to my stomach

I was Going but i was waiting till dark came then I was gonna go see him i was so depressed I know i should have Attended his funeral even though i didn't want to be seen and well because i didn't wanna believe that all of this was real I should h...

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I was Going but i was waiting till dark came then I was gonna go see him
i was so depressed I know i should have Attended his funeral even though i didn't want to be seen and well because i didn't wanna believe that all of this was real I should have been there. I stood in the cemetery looking down at the fresh dirt tears rolling down my cheeks Tig and Kozik stood close by i kissed the top of his tombstone this is not how we we're sopost to end i should of died with you but life is not done punishing me for what i did I love you so much i wish i could go back to that first day we met and our first night on stage i felt so alive and it was all becouse of you. You saved me and now even though your gone you've left me with the most precious gift i could ever ask for Our baby boy the wind started picking up it blowing through my hair i looked up from the ground and saw G standing a few feet back leaning up against a tree with his arm's crossed he stood there shakeing his head in disagreement as if he had just heard what i had just said

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