Once Upon The Outsiders (Fairytale Version)

The Ugly Barnacle

Once there was an ugly barnacle

He was so ugly

that everyone

DIED.

The End

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Wait, wait, wait. That's not all. Supposed you haven't heard the real story of the Ugly Barnacle.

Greaser style.

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So, as the story goes,

Once there was an Ugly Sociable

His name was Bob,

Bob Sheldon to be exact.

Now, Bob was an ordinary young fellow

With madras shirts and flooded pants

And don't forget the cool blue Mustang.

His friend in tow,

Randy Adderson

Was an ugly sociable too.

So both Bob and Randy were ugly sociables.

Ugly not based on looks,

just

UGLY.

Now one night,

Bob and Randy and their fellow gang

Took their girls,

Cherry Valance and Marcia,

out to the drive-in theater

which permitted uglies.

So, along with Bob and Randy's interesting drinking problems,

they could not enter.

They let Cherry and Marcia left on their lonesome

watching some beach movie.

Now that same night,

when Bob and Randy were getting drunk

in the cool blue mustang,

three non-uglies hung out with Cherry and Marcia.

The three non-uglies,

which were greasers

another name for non-uglies,

were getting to know the girls.

Ponyboy Curtis, the first non-ugly

Johnny Cade, the second

and Dallas Winston, the third

had a pretty non-uglified night with the girls.

Dallas got splashed with Cherry's coke,

and soon left to go slash Tim's tires

another non-ugly.

Ponyboy chatted with Cherry,

and Johnny tagged along.

Then, another non-ugly joined,

Two-Bit Mathews,

and was flirting with Marcia the entire time.

Now, when the movie ended,