broken ; egd

twenty nine

this chapter contains parts talking about self harm. i am letting you all know before you read. love you guys.

talias pov-
we are at the airport, waiting for our flight to board. ethan and grayson went to get us some starbucks. billie and i are sitting. she pokes my side causing me to jump.

"bil what the fuckkk." i say laughing.
"im bored bitch. the boys are taking too long." she says and as if on cue we see the boys walking towards us.

as they walk towards us they get stopped by a girl. she goes up to ethan. she touches his shoulder and ethan gives her a weird look.

oh hell no. nobodys hitting on my boyfriend. i get up and walk over to them.

"hi baby! ah youre back with starbucks. thank you so much e." i smile and look at him.

the girl glares at me and i send her a fake smile.

"who is this?" i ask ethan.
"i actually dont know, she asked for my number. i was gonna say that i had a girlfriend but you came right on time." he explains. she turns red.
"sorry. hes kinda taken." i send her a smile and she just glares. we walk back to where we were sitting.

"youre a bad bitch." billie says.
"we established that a while ago sis." i flip my hair cockily, as a joke of course.

everyone laughs and we just talk about random stuff. suddenly someone i havent thought about in months came to my mind.

"when do you guys think destin will get out of jail?" i ask them. billies breath hitches, ethans eyes go wide, and grayson awkwardly coughs. what the fuck?

"u-uh i actually dont know, b-but he should stay in there for a long time right?" billie awkwardly laughs.

i nod, i am so confused. do they know something that i dont? they would obviously tell me if something did happen though, right?

_________

our flight is boarding and we are rushing. we give the person our tickets and head to the plane.

ethan and grayson go to touch each end of the plane before we get on. i still dont understand why they do that.

we get on and find our seats. i sit next to ethan and across from us billie sits next to grayson. billie and i get the window seats.

i put my headphones on and put on some music. i put my head on ethans shoulder and grab his hand.

i fiddle around and play with his fingers. ive always played with peoples hands, its weird.

i look at ethan and hes watching a movie. i close my eyes, wanting to sleep. i cant though.

_________

we have been on the plane for about 7 hours now. i cant sleep. ethan, grayson, and billie are all deep asleep. my mind is blank, but my body wont sleep.

i look at ethan while he sleeps, admiring every single feature of his face. the little soft snores coming from his mouth. gosh, what would i do if i never met him. id probably do something that would have a permanent outcome. something thatll never let me see the light of day ever again. its not like i havent thought about it before, ive just never tried it.

i look down at my wrists. old scars. i havent harmed myself in a very long time though. i am so proud of myself. sometimes i just want to give up.