Feelings || A Changlix Fanfic

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I can't believe I was so stupid. I was stupid enough to think that if Changbin became Felix's boyfriend my feelings for him would go away. What a mistake... We've been friends for seven whole years but we've only been friends, and that is not what I wanted.
Things have changed a lot since Felix came into the picture. Chan met a guy named Woojin and they are head over heals for each other. Minho and Jisung started their relationship up again, gayer than ever. And then there's Changbin and Felix who are together... The only others who are single besides me are Jeongin and Seungmin, although Seungmin seams to be into someone. But people's couple status aren't the only things that have changed. Changbin himself did too. He reduced the cuss word levels drastically, and it's you-know-who who is making him soft. Don't get me wrong, they're cute together, but Felix is not me. I wish that instead of hearing, "Oh my gosh, Felix is so lucky to be with Changbin!" I would hear, "Oh my gosh, Hyunjin is so lucky to be with Changbin!" But that can't happen. It never will.
I look up from my feet, and look into the cafeteria window. I see them, the two lovebirds eating lunch together, laughing and smiling. Seungmin and Jeongin aren't even there, they wanted to give them some alone time. I ate with Chan, Jisung, Woojin, and Minho, but I was a third wheel again, except it was evening worse since there were two couples around me. That leads me to here. I'm sitting on a bench all alone. I couldn't bare being with them anymore, so I left. Sighing, I place my head in my hands and just try to forget everything. Someone sits down next to me and puts their hand on my shoulder. "You okay, Hyunjin? You haven't been yourself lately." It's Seungmin. It's really quite soothing to hear his kind gentle voice. "I don't know how or what to feel anymore," I say glumly. "What do you mean?" he asks. I can't keep it in anymore so I just spill my feelings out. I tell him about my jealousy, feeling left out, what things used to be like versus now, the whole deal. He listens carefully to each words I say. He nods his head or occasionally says "Oh.." but he pretty much stays silent until I'm done. He thinks a bit before replying. Taking a deep breath he starts to speak: "I think you have to learn how to let go. You have to move on. Changbin hasn't been this happy in a long time, if not ever," he suggests. "But I can't. It's been years but this month has been the worst it's ever been since they got together." I say. "I know it's hard, but if he left Felix for you he would be more focused on missing him than loving you," Seungmin says gently. "Try to concentrate on having fun with your friends then thinking about him," he adds.
"But he is my friend. Both of them are," I reply exasperated. "Then come with us. We're your friends too," Seungmin smiles getting up from the bench and offering me his hand. I get up and we start walking around the school. "What about you? How's it going with your crush?" I ask him. "Same as you, he likes someone else, although his crush doesn't like him back. But that's not getting in my way. I still have my heart filled with feelings and my brain filled with thoughts of him. I won't give up! I just hope he notices my signs soon," Seungmin says heads in the clouds of love. "Who are you sending signs to though?" I ask. The bell rings and Seungmin turns to me and says "Hopefully one day you'll be able to find out..!" and then he speeds off to his next class.
I wonder what the hell he could mean by, «Hopefully one day you'll be able to find out»? Is he giving me a hint? Is it obvious? Whoever he likes probably loves him back, because Seungmin is the sweetest, kindest, funniest, cutest boy out there. It's so easy to fall in love with his charms. I will gladly give a lesson to the guy who is ignoring his hints, no one will lure Seungmin in just to ignore him and get away with it. Changbin and Felix pass in front of me on their way to japanese class, but I try to focus on figuring out who stole Seungmin's heart. This must be what it's like to "get over it." The monster feeling of being replaced is trying to come out of its cave, but Minnie's advice replays in my head, and I shake the jealousy away.
I think of all the people that Seungmin knows. First of all, he said that his crush is single. That crosses plenty people off my list. He's friends with Jeongin, Wonpil, Heejun, and me. When Seungmin looks at Jeongin, the look of friendship is in his eyes not love. He looks up to Wonpil and he's kind of like Heejun's little brother more than anything. That leaves me. N-no, he couldn't have a crush on me. Impossible. I get flustered thinking that I could be of a love interest to Seungmin, but I'm not of course! But why not? «Hopefully  one day you'll be able to find out» makes actual sense, and it would explain why he came to talk to me alone, as Jeongin could have come along as well, but he didn't. But Seungmin, doesn't like me, it's impossible. I do have to admit that he's cute and smart, and we know each other well but I like Changbin. Changbin who makes me mad and sorry for myself. I shake my head. No. What I need to survive is not Changbin's  fire kindled with rage and hatred. What I need is the cherry blossom in the spring. The fresh flavor that tastes sweet instead of bitter. The promise that life can go on no matter how bad it was in the past. That it can be good again. And only Seungmin can give me that.
I cry to him who was about to enter the door of the school building. I run up to the beautiful boy who shined a light on how I feel.
"I-I'm sorry for not noticing before but, I think I know who you like..." I say. He looks surprised and says "Ohh... Who do you think it is?" My heart is racing, but it's now or never. "How do you...How do you feel about me?" I ask gathering my confidence. "I think that you're a kind hearted person, you have the best laugh and I am really grateful for you," he answers smiling. I take a step forwards and put my hand on his cheek. He blushes and looks down, but he doesn't turn away. "Seungmin... I was wrong all along. It wasn't love what I was feeling for Changbin. It was something else, that I'm still not sure what it was, but I am certain that I feel love for someone else. That person is you." I confess.
I don't think I've said something like that to  anyone, but Seungmin definitely had the right to be the first. "Hyunjin hyung, I'm really glad. I would have been to shy to say it first but, I love you too," he says. I put my other hand on his other cheek and our faces are drawn together. He smells like berries and his lips are soft. It's the perfect place for a perfect kiss as all the other students have already gotten to their classes so the school yard is empty and peaceful.

My life is better when Kim Seungmin is in it.

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That chapter was so long wow
I know this is a Changlix fanfic but I really love Seungjin and I wanted them to have a part. And I'm sorry for so much skinship in this book, I myself am a super cuddly person so my love of hugs reflects on this lmao. Also, generally, your real life relationship shouldn't be like theirs or even Changlix's as the feelings are really rushed. I can't take up 5 chapters for Hyunjin to get over Changbin which is more realistic, so I rushed it into one. BUT PLEASE DONT GO AND KISS SOMEONE THAT YOU MIGHT LIKE, MAKE SURE TO TAKE YOUR TIME FIGURING OUT YOUR FEELINGS!! Again I've proven myself overprotective jbkdbjc

I also quoted the hunger games although I did adjust it to fit my characters better. Have a good day and make sure to eat well!

~Mandi