The New Pretty Guardian, Sailor Cheney

Chapter 1(Juan), Atie Juanie

"Those liberals are going to make me be late to school again!" exclaimed Atie Juanie as she ran down the stairs while brushing her short, soft amber hair.  She shoved a piece of toast into her mouth like every other anime school girl does, threw her hair brush back upstairs, and ran out the door.  As she was running down the sidewalk to her school which was only a few blocks away she tripped over a cat.  "Ow! Darn liberals letting their cats trip me all the time!" she yelled to herself because nobody else was around.  "Nya?" said the cat.  Atie stood back up and examined the cat.  It looked like a pickle.  It had clearly not eaten in days so Atie dropped the piece of toast for the cat and got on her way. 

A few hours later she was stuck in math class staring out the window because, of course, her desk was right next to the window.  Just then the evil teacher who hated everyone in the class handed out a test.  She took one look at the test and knew she was going to fail.  She sighed and looked back out the window.  To her surprise the cat she had seen earlier was outside on the window sill, staring with its glowing eyes back at her.  "Dear cat, please help me!" Atie thought to herself.  Just at that moment, the cat seemed to wink at her then scamper away.  "Typical liberal..." she thought to herself.  Her eyes wandered back down to her paper and... all the answers were filled in!  Atie couldn't help but to let out a gasp.  The teacher walked over and said "Stop causing so much commotion or i'll call your parents!".  "Sorry, sir!" said Atie, still in shock.  The teacher looked at the paper and saw it was all filled in.  "Done already? Must all be wrong as usual!"  said the teacher.  He grabbed the paper and did a 180 back to his desk. 

Atie sat in shock for the rest of her classes.  She couldn't believe what had happened. "Could that cat really have been... a magical pickle?" Thought Atie as she was walking home after her chaotic day.  She wasn't looking in front of herself (as usual) and tripped over something once again.  "This is the second time those liberals have tripped me today!  But this is beyond the work of liberals.  It must be the jews!"  yelled Atie in confusion.  Before she could realize what she tripped on she heard a sharp "Nyaaaa!" below her.  She sprung up and saw the pickle cat once again.  "You, cat!  Are you working with the jews?!  How did you do that to my test earlier?!  What are you?!"  Atie yelled in frustration at the cat.  "You asked me to help you so I did!"  said the cat.  Atie screamed.  "A TALKING CAT?! YOU'RE DEFINITELY WORKING WITH THE JEWS!".  "Stop accusing everyone of working with the jews all the time! You do it too much!"  said the cat in anger.  "How do you know I do that all the time?!" said Atie as she was still freaking out.  "I've been watching you, Atie Juanie.  You're meant to become something special in this world... the way you look up at the sky with your telescope at night, the way you rant about how there's more planets out there... I've never seen a girl like you!  You've gotta have a connection to those people somehow!  And i'm going to find out exactly how!".  "Please cut back on carbon emissions."  she said as she started walking off.  "My name is Darla by the way, and you're my new owner! Nya!" said the cat scampering after Atie, "Don't worry, I know your mom will let you keep me because she's been wanting a cat for a while! Nya!".  "Dear Darla..." said Atie trying not to faceplant into the nearest wall.